The Unfortunate Side Effects of Heartbreak and Magic

by Breanne Randall

Some people needed flowers and pretty words. Sadie needed truth and kept promises.

Sadie hated that word fine. It was a Band-Aid, a sugar-coated pill to mask the bitterness beneath. Fine was what you used when it was anything but.

Gigi explained why mustard seed helped people talk about their feelings and how star anise could bond two people together.

Gigi warned her how their creations would speak to them. If you were in love, things tended to turn out too sweet. If dinner was bland, you needed some adventure. And if you burned a dessert—well, something wicked this way comes.

Vanilla Jasmine Tea with Black Pepper and Cinnamon If you don’t like spice, you won’t like this. It’s a spicy floral tea that will give you the clarity to see what’s missing in your life while helping draw those things to you through good fortune. But remember, good fortune will only get you so far, and for the rest you’ll have to rely on your own wit and wisdom. Ingredients jasmine tea 1 vanilla bean pod 1–2 drops cinnamon bark oil

1–2 drops black pepper oil Directions 1. Scrape vanilla bean pod into pot of boiling water, strain, and use to brew tea. 2. Drop in cinnamon bark oil and black pepper oil. Enjoy. (To increase clarity and focus, diffuse 4 drops clary sage and 4 drops frankincense while drinking tea.)

there’s a difference between being happy and being fulfilled. Happiness you feel in your skin. Fulfillment you feel in your bones.”

Salted Cream Cold Foam Cold Brew with Earl Grey The bergamot in Earl Grey helps to alleviate anxiety, and the caffeine gives a boost of energy. The salt helps to keep from being bewitched. See, even a simple cup of coffee can serve its purpose. Ingredients cold brew coffee Earl Grey tea, brewed and cooled skim milk salt maple syrup cinnamon oil (optional) mason jar

Directions 1. Combine your preferred amount of skim milk with a dash or two of salt, a quick pour of maple syrup (or more if you like it extra sweet), and 1 drop of cinnamon oil, if you’re using it, into a mason jar. Shake vigorously for a minute or two. 2. Fill a glass with ice, and then fill halfway with Earl Grey and the rest of the way with cold brew. Top with salted cold cream.

A pungent aroma painted itself across her skin, her eyes watering. The ruin stopped just past the fence line, at the thin, towering stalks of dill, planted for the express purpose of keeping out malevolent magic. But they’d sacrificed themselves in the process. Years ago, Sadie had laughed when Gigi instructed her to plant the herb in abundance. After all, what kind of garden needed that much protection?

Her grandmother had put a dash of white mustard powder in the dough, which was meant to help the eater get things off their chest and deal with challenges.

Get it and sprinkle what’s in it around the perimeter of the house and garden,” Gigi said. “Salt and pennyroyal oil,” Sadie said, and Gigi nodded. “Something wicked is on the wing. It’s trying to get in, and I aim to stop it. At least for a little while longer.”

Fog on a clear night meant someone was waiting for death.

Cherry Cheese Pie The easiest, foolproof, no-bake dessert around. Seth would beg me for this dumb ol’ pie for every special occasion he could think of, but Sadie never could stand it. That girl just has something against being peaceful, I think. A slice or two of this pie will help to ensure peace when an argument is sure to happen. Perfect for family gatherings. Ingredients 1 (8-oz.) package cream cheese 1 (14-oz.) can sweetened condensed milk ⅓ c. lemon juice 1 tsp. vanilla extract 1 (9-inch) prepared graham cracker crust

1 (21-oz.) can cherry pie filling Directions 1. In a large bowl, beat cream cheese until fluffy. Beat in milk until smooth. Stir in lemon juice and vanilla, then pour mixture into graham cracker crust. 2. Cover and refrigerate for three hours or until set. Top with cherry pie filling.

Healing Salve Apply this to minor cuts, scrapes, and bruises. Helps with inflammation and healing and works as an anti-infection and anti-microbial. Had to perfect this when the kids were little because they were like bulls in a china shop. Then, of course, Seth and Sadie turned out just the same. Ingredients 2 T. coconut oil 2 drops each of: tea tree oil helichrysum lavender frankincense

1–2 tsp. beeswax pellets (optional, just makes the balm firmer) 1 oz. tin Directions 1. In a small double boiler, melt the coconut oil and beeswax until just melted. 2. Take off heat and let cool for just a minute or two before adding the oils. 3. Pour into your container, and then refrigerate to solidify. Apply as needed. Helps speed up the healing time and fights infection.

Harvest Soap for Luck Ingredients unscented castile soap vitamin E oil clear cold-pressed Mexican vanilla Essential oils clove cinnamon orange lemon Directions 1. In a 16-oz. glass pump bottle, combine 2 T. castile soap, a squirt of vitamin E oil, and a splash of the Mexican vanilla.

2. Next, add 5 drops of clove, 10 drops of cinnamon, and 15 drops each of lemon and orange. Fill the rest slowly with water.

Maple Butterscotch Walnut Fudge It won’t heal sorrow, but it will spark wisdom and strength, traditionally for new beginnings, ventures, or the new year. I also made it the day before Sadie and I opened the café. Running that place with my favorite girl have been some of the best years of my life. Ingredients 1 c. white chocolate chips 1 c. butterscotch chips 1 c. chocolate chips 1 can (14-oz.) sweetened condensed milk ¼ lb. butter (1 stick) 1 tsp. maple extract (maybe a dash more)

1½ c. chopped walnuts Directions 1. Grease and line an 8 × 8-inch dish with parchment paper. Combine chips, sweetened condensed milk, and butter in a microwavable bowl. 2. Heat the bowl for 30 seconds at a time, giving it a stir after each time, until everything is just melted. Don’t overdo it, or the chips will get grainy. 3. Stir in maple extract and walnuts. 4. Pour fudge mixture into tin. Refrigerate until set, and then cut into squares.

Dream Catcher Hot Chocolate It’s more work than the instant packets, but that stuff is crap anyway. This will cure bad dreams and send the drinker off to a sweet slumber. It can also cure headaches and heartaches and make you feel like all is right in the world. Ingredients 3 c. whole milk 3 T. good-quality cocoa powder 6 oz. semisweet chocolate (sub milk chocolate for creamier taste, or bittersweet for extra punch) 3 T. sugar

splash of vanilla extract dash of cinnamon Optional: Fine sea salt sprinkled on top or mixed in gives it that delicious salty-sweet flavor. Directions 1. Bring ¾ c. water to simmer. Whisk in cocoa powder until smooth, add milk, and return to simmer. 2. Whisk in chocolate, sugar, cinnamon, vanilla, and salt, and stir until mixture is smooth and chocolate is melted—about 5 minutes. 3. Split among mugs, and top with whipped cream and marshmallows.

Marjoram and White Pepper Macaroni and Cheese I always bake this before someone leaves for a trip. It works for happiness and good tidings on a new adventure. Ingredients ½ lb. elbow macaroni 3 T. butter 3 T. flour 1 T. powdered mustard 1 tsp. onion powder 3 c. milk 1 egg

12 oz. cheddar (however sharp you like it) 1 tsp salt 1 tsp white pepper ¼ tsp. finely chopped fresh marjoram For the topping 3 T. butter 1 c. breadcrumbs (I recommend doubling or tripling this if you like extra topping.) Directions 1. Preheat oven to 350ºF. Cook pasta to al dente (make sure the water is salted). 2. While the pasta cooks, melt the butter in a separate pot. Whisk in the flour, mustard, and onion powder, and keep stirring for about 5 minutes (if you don’t, there

will be lumps). Stir in the milk, and simmer for 10 minutes, adding the marjoram at the last minute. 3. Whisk in the egg, stir in ¾ of the cheese, add salt and pepper. Fold the macaroni into the mix, and pour into a 2-quart casserole dish. Top with remaining cheese and maybe a little Parmesan if you have some. 4. Melt the butter in a sauté pan, and...

“Clary sage is used for clarity, for emotional stability. And it can spark creativity and imagination. It calms the mind and spirit,” Sadie said, pulling Sage in to hug her. “I’ve never known a name more fitting for someone. Thank you.”

Athena’s Tea Wisdom of the head is useless without wisdom of the heart. Drink this tea to bring both in balance. This is a caffeine free tea meant to be sipped before bed to sweeten your dreams. Ingredients 2 spoons of Rooibos tea 1–2 tsp dried apple 1 inch of cinnamon stick ½ inch vanilla pod squeeze of honey (optional) Directions Steep in hot water 7 minutes, strain, and drink while it’s still piping hot for full

effects.

Orange Honey Vanilla Scones I like to use these when people refuse to talk to each other. Encourages openness and honesty with a little kick of joy. Made them for Dickie once, and they didn’t work on him. Some people are just too stubborn, even for magic. Ingredients 2 c. all-purpose flour 1 T. baking powder ¼ tsp. kosher salt 7 T. cold unsalted butter cut into 1 T. squares ¾ c. heavy cream 1 T. vanilla extract

2 T. dried chrysanthemum flowers ¼ c. orange-infused honey Directions 1. Preheat the oven to 375ºF. 2. Mix the flour, salt, and baking powder in a large mixing bowl. 3. Using a pastry blender or two knives, cut in the butter until it’s well incorporated and you have pea-sized chunks. 4. Combine the heavy cream, orange honey, chrysanthemum flowers, and vanilla extract in a measuring cup, and pour into the mixing bowl. 5. Stir with a wooden spoon until the mixture starts to come together into a ball.

6. Transfer the shaggy dough and any unincorporated dry bits to a very lightly floured large cutting board or work surface. Knead briefly until it just comes together, and shape into approximately an 8 × 8-inch square. 7. Cut into eight 2 × 2-inch squares and, and then cut those into triangles. Transfer to your baking sheet. 8. Bake 8–12 minutes until cooked through with light golden edges. 9. Remove from the...

Finally, she settled on a drop of valor for courage, patchouli for her free spirit, white angelica for peace, and lavender for calm.

Chocolate Pecan Pie They say pecans are good for healing strength and longevity, but really the family just loves this pie. Ingredients 1 c. corn syrup (light or dark is fine) 3 eggs 1 c. granulated sugar 2 T. butter, melted 2 tsp. vanilla extract 1½ c. coarsely chopped pecans 1 c. chocolate chips 1 pie crust—I don’t know the recipe; that’s Sadie’s domain. Buy it premade, or make her give you the recipe.

Directions 1. Preheat oven to 350ºF, and place a baking tray in the oven to preheat. 2. Line the bottom of the pie crust with the chocolate chips. 3. Mix corn syrup, eggs, sugar, butter, and vanilla. Stir in pecans, and pour mixture over chocolate chips. 4. Bake for about an hour or until the pecans are toasty brown, or if you want to be precise about it, until the center is 200ºF—that’s what Sadie tells me. It’s supposed to cool for 2 hours, but that girl can’t wait more than 15 minutes before biting into it, and she burns her damn mouth every time, that stinker.

Hyacinth Bean Soup If someone has a grievance against you or you’re looking for forgiveness (for yourself or others), then this is the soup you want. Hearty and perfect for fall and winter. If you can’t find hyacinth beans, substitute navy beans. Ingredients 1 onion, diced 2 tomatoes, diced 3 medium potatoes, diced 3 medium carrots, diced 2 c. hyacinth beans (also called njahi beans) 3 c. water, vegetable stock, or chicken stock salt to taste

1 tsp. garlic powder dash of thyme Directions 1. Boil the hyacinth beans twice, changing the water between batches (skip this step if using navy beans, and simply rinse and strain them) 2. Fry onions in oil until translucent, add tomatoes and carrots and let cook for 2–3 minutes. 3. Add beans, onion mixture, and potatoes to a slow cooker or stockpot. Add salt, garlic, and thyme. Let cook until the potatoes are done (but not mushy). 4. Serve with rice.

Orange-Infused Honey This is sure to bring joy back into the lives of those who eat it. Don’t have too much, though, because when your life is full of blessings, you tend to forget gratitude. And that right there is the key to keeping a happy life. Ingredients honey (preferably raw) oranges, sliced thinly mason jar Directions 1. Stack the orange slices and place them in the mason jar. Pour the honey over until

nearly full. Put the lid on tight, and slowly tilt to make sure the honey coats everything. 2. Let sit in the pantry for 5 days (the longer you let it sit, the stronger the flavor). 3. Strain—be patient, this may take a while.

“A little bacon, butter, or sugar can improve just about any recipe.” But most importantly, “Hold on to hope no matter the cost, because as long as there’s hope, everything else is just the unfortunate side effects of heartbreak and magic.”