The Tragedy of Felix and Jake

by J. Daniels

This is a love story. It’s messy complicated and kind of ugly sometimes. It’s also made of magical things like forehead kisses. It’s our tragedy. Love fucking rules, Felix <3

I was twenty-eight when I found out that I’ll never beat it. My name is Jake Tully, and I’m an addict.

“Holy fuck. You can smile.” A laugh bursts out of my mouth, and I swear to God, you’d think I just made Felix’s day. He looks so proud to hear it.

He halts at the entrance to the kitchen. “What are you doing?” I look down at the cookie sheet I’ve just pulled out of the oven, the one I’m still currently holding in front of myself. “Knitting a sweater.”

I follow his gaze and look down at the apron I’m wearing. It’s adorned with flowers. I’m certain it’s Riley’s. “I’ve fully embraced this, and I regret nothing. So, go fuck yourself.”

I want him to know it doesn’t really bother me, I’m just curious about his reason. I want to tell him it hasn’t always been exclusively girls for me.

Yes, he sends me heart emojis. Old school ones. You know: <3 And no, I’m not sending them back. Or acknowledging I’ve received any. So, you see? I’m fine. Nothing else is happening. No one needs to worry. I’ve got this. Keep reading to find out how much of a liar I am.

can I drive us tonight? please? my car stopped smelling like u and it sucks so much :(

“Can you say it? Please?” Can I say it? Yes. I so very easily can. “He touched you. Nobody touches you.”

“Everything is stacked against us,” I say. “We’d be a tragedy, Felix. This wouldn’t work.” His smile is confusing. “You don’t agree?” I ask, and how fucked up is it that I actually hope he doesn’t. “No. I agree.” He steps closer and presses one (last) kiss to my mouth. “I just know that wouldn’t stop me.”

Feelings are dumb. I wish I never felt them.

B Is For Boyfriend (And Butt-Fucking) (Sorry. Please Keep Reading)

“I’m so happy you love eating ass, Jake. Am I glowing? I feel like I’m glowing.”

I wonder if my boyfriend knows how cute he is let me ask him jake do u know how cute u are

Are you really going to drive six hours one way just to spend a day with me?” “I’d drive six hours one way just to spend an hour with you.”

Today, I am eight hundred and twenty-seven days sober. My name is Jake Tully and I’m an addict. And I’ll always be an addict. I’ll never beat this. But I’ll keep going to meetings, and I’ll talk to my sponsor (who I’m going to ask to marry me), and I’ll fight this until I win. We are going to win.