Those Who Wait

by Haley Cass

Regan – 11:40PM I know it’s only been a couple of days but I’m lonely without you :’( Regan – 11:44PM You’re not mad at me, right? I returned the boots I borrowed from youuuu

Regan – 11:48PM Goodnight, princess!

Regan – 9:01AM Praise jesus, I have the day off! And I did your laundry with mine & cleaned your room. I hope you’re coming home today, I miss your beautiful face

Charlotte – 2:09AM I still want to be your friend, Sutton. I care so incredibly much about you. So much. So . . . much.

And I know there’s still some more to talk about, if you wanted to. And the following night: Charlotte – 2:54AM Please let me know whenever you’re ready to talk. I’m sorry.

Do you know I love you? I don’t want you to be sorry, I want you to want me.

Alia’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but are you okay? You don’t look. . . great.”

“Nothing I say is going to make it easier, Sutton.” There was a pleading tone in her voice that nearly broke her. It was just so not Charlotte to sound like that.

“You wrote them! You came to me, this was your idea, and you left me with this piece of

paper with the agreements that I’ve been staring at for days hoping that you really meant what you said. You’re the one who wrote on there that we were friends. That we put that first,” Charlotte’s palm slammed onto the table, the same fire in her words, before she curled it into a tight fist.

“And I’ve been terrified that I’m losing you for good. I need to know that we really are friends, Sutton. T...

“I want you to be in my life, because my life is better with you in it.”

“I want you, too, Sutton. But I just can’t . . . do it in the same way you want me.”

“I’m in love with you and that’s not just going to go away because we aren’t sleeping together. I think . . . I think maybe you love me, too. Or you could, and you’re just too scared to do anything about it.”

“My God, with that level of concentration, I’m shocked you haven’t not only conquered the entire country, but also laser vision.”

“With that kind of comedy, I’m shocked you haven’t made it in stand-up.” She rolled her eyes,

“As your boss, I’m telling you that you aren’t going to show your face here until Tuesday at the earliest.”

“As my boss, shouldn’t you be glad that you have such a dedicated employee?” She shot back.

Sutton, my lovely ginger sunflower – I know you still feel like you shouldn’t go and leave me without half of the rent, but that is craziness. You’re so smart and this is ROME! You’re going to ROME and that is so fucking EXCITING! You’re not allowed to feel guilty about your share of the bills here. Because Emma – yes, your uptight and kinda bitchy friend Emma who can’t stand anything about me, apparently, for no reason whatsoever – is going to live in your vacated room. She’s been trying to get out of her shitty apartment with her vampiric roommate(s?) that’s basically a subway cubicle for months and has agreed that despite her (insane) dislike of me, our apartment is a perfect place for her to live for the next few months.

It makes up the rent that I won’t be able to afford and it gives her time to search for a viable option while not living in a miserable shithole. Plus it’s apparently way closer to her new job or whatever. We have all of the details figured out. For all of her irritating aspects, her best feature by far is that she cares about you. We have that in common. Pack your bags, babe, because you are not going to miss out on showing off to the world how amazing you are. I took the liberty of filling out your acceptance form :) you just gotta send it in. Happy birthday best friend!

“The world wants to sell the lie, especially to beautiful young women like you, that love is the pinnacle of what you should aspire to. But know, my dear, that there’s so much more for you to look forward to than that. In the grand scheme of this life, you have all the power to control your fate if you make the smart choices.”

Elizabeth scoffed. “That’s all you have to say? Christ, I had this expedited to my office before the numbers break on tonight’s news, running on my elderly bones down to your department –”

She couldn’t have rolled her eyes any harder. “Don’t try to make it sound like you don’t power walk every morning for an hour.” Her grandmother ignored her. “And your response to leading a poll at twenty-two percent is that it’s great news to start your interview off with?”

“Yes, it is,” her grandmother’s tone was clipped and dismissive and comforting in how typical it was. Then it softened, “But you aren’t happy.” Pulling back in surprise, Charlotte let out a disbelieving laugh. “What? Of course I’m happy.”

“There’s a difference between being happy about something and being happy. One of them is fleeting.”

“You make it sound as if I wouldn’t recognize when my own granddaughter is happy. If I had told you that you would have this lead on Naomi at the very beginning of this election, your eyes would have lit up. You’d have had trouble hiding exactly how damn happy you’d have been and don’t even try to deny it to me.”

“She’s more than that. She’s . . .” Swallowing hard, she dropped her eyes again, tracing them over the way Sutton was laughing so openly and boldly in those pictures. The sight gave her the slightest comfort, something to hold onto in this storm. “She’s so much more than that.”

“I’ve learned that love is about finding someone who pulls you to them even when reason might tell you otherwise. Someone who pushes you out of your comfort zone, not because of them doing or saying anything, necessarily, but because they make you want to try new things. They make you want to be daring, because maybe something new and scary doesn’t feel quite as scary by their side.”

“Someone you see all of. Strengths and flaws, even the ones they aren’t aware of.” The times she’d seen not only how clever and passionate and ambitious Charlotte was – both in impressive ways and in detrimental ones. But also the times she was able to see how beautifully vulnerable she could be, too. How loyal, how sympathetic. In ways she knew Charlotte didn’t see herself in. “Someone who sees you for everything you are, too.” She bit her lip. “Someone who sees all of it and chooses you, anyway.”

“And the only thing that could ever be better than feeling this way about that person is that they feel it back.”

“You’re my best friend, Sutton. You know when I can be pushy or when I give you crap, I do really just want you to be happy.”

“I’m in love with you, Sutton. Terrifyingly, irreversibly, life-alteringly in love with you.”

Charlotte used that hold to tug her forward again. “It means that I’ll be here when you get back.”

“I’ll be here,” she promised with utter certainty. “I’ve only just gotten you, Sutton Spencer; I’m letting you go, but I’m not letting you go.”

Charlotte was in love with her. Enough to put much of the beginning of their official relationship on...

“We’ll talk about it more,” Charlotte murmured, “We have a month to figure everything out. B...

They only opened when Charlotte’s hands fell to her hips and gently started swaying along with the fall of music that came from inside. She moved with her easily for a few moments, before she couldn’t help but ask, “What would you have done? If I said it was too late?” A few seconds beat by before Charlotte hummed against her ear. “I would have left. For now. But I am remarkably dedicated to achieving my goals, you know, and I plan for the long haul.” “So I would have been a goal, then? You’d have waited for me?” She let out a disbelieving

laugh, and she didn’t think she should be as utterly charmed by that as she was, but, here they were. “Darling,” Charlotte pulled back, a slow smile spreading over her face. “Haven’t you ever heard that good things come to those who wait?”