If there is a God I would like to humbly ask Him—whilst making it clear that I am deeply grateful for His suddenly turning Daniel inexplicably into a regular feature after so much fuckwittage—to stop him getting into bed at night wearing pajamas and reading glasses, staring at a book for twenty-five minutes then switching off the light and turning over—and turn him back into the naked lust-crazed sex beast I used to know and love. Thanking you for your kind attention, Lord, regarding this matter.
