I’ve been this fidgety and out of sorts ever since he let me hug him in the cottage yesterday. He didn’t physically comfort me, but his presence was enough to create a sense of safety. It’s how I managed to pull myself together and abandon the suicidal thought of throwing myself into a dangerous situation. He didn’t need to say anything or to even touch me. Just the feel of his hard muscles and steady heartbeat were enough to silence the demons inside me. I was relying on myself for years and that entailed burying my emotions and struggling to survive. I got so used to that feeling until that
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