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January 17 - January 26, 2024
well-being of mothers is linked to four factors: feeling unconditionally loved, feeling comforted when distressed, authenticity in relationships, and satisfaction with friendships.
On the one hand, self-care is seen as a woman’s responsibility and part of living up to society’s expectations of taking care of our individual needs. On the other hand, selflessness, especially in the service of children or partners, is viewed as the feminine ideal.
“Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”
Other people will have their own feelings about your boundaries, but they cannot create them. A boundary is about what you need to interact in the world.
Boundaries are hard not because you can’t identify yours, but because you are worried about the backlash. Remember
effectively say no we must learn to tolerate other people’s disappointment and trust that it is not a moral failing on our part.
The goal is not to stop feeling guilty, but instead, to turn down the volume and not let guilt control your decisions.
In other words, guilt does not need to be our compass.
You don’t need to have a cruel inner critic to get things done.
The truth is that you can be trained to respond to a kind voice too. It is worth the risk to give yourself permission to pay less attention to the inner critic.
When the inner critic is the only or the loudest voice, we get caught in toxic inner narrative.
One of the biggest factors that gets in the way of self-compassion is a stifled ability to receive help, because we feel we either do not deserve it or that we are not needy enough.
Who are we to accept help?
we reframed accepting support, love, or attention from others as a skill that we need to build up?
Humans thrive on shared connection—instead of resisting and turning away supports in your life, remind yourself that the people who offer help are receiving as well.
Envisioning acts of embodiment and rest as resistance can fill you with a sense of agency and control.
feel connected with your values and are engaged in activities that align with them.
Identifying our values in an explicit way emboldens us to make clear choices. And those choices lead to purpose and a sense of fulfillment.
