other type of manipulation is relational. Abusers masterfully cultivate an immense amount of loyalty from those they serve with. This is accomplished in a number of ways, usually by flattery (“You are so gifted”), by entrusting someone with a secret (“I am telling only you”), including someone in the inner circle (“Only a select few are invited to this meeting”), or even by confessing selective sins of their own (what DeGroat calls “fauxnerability”).32 In short, the abuser grooms people in a way that is not all that different from what happens in cases of sexual abuse, manipulating them to
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