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“You never considered that it was you I couldn’t stay away from?” I crook my right arm and jab it into Xaden’s biceps. He doesn’t mean that. Not when he’s still adamant that kissing me was a mistake. And if he does… I’m not going there. “Now, now, you’ll give our little communication secret away if you can’t keep from being so…violent.” He barely restrains a smile, obviously loving that he gets the last word.
Xaden lifts a hand a few inches above the table, and shadows pour from underneath our seats, filling the room and turning it dark as midnight in a blink. My heart jumps as my sight goes black. “Relax. It’s just me.” A ghost of a touch skims my cheek. Just him is slightly…terrifying.
“I hope you didn’t get any ideas while we were in the dark there,” Xaden teases, and just like that, my sympathy for the ass evaporates. I don’t bother to face him, just raise one finger. He chuckles, and I grit my teeth. “Get him out of my head,” I toss in Tairn’s direction. “You’ll get used to it,” Tairn responds. “Is this normal with all mated pairs and their riders?” “For some. It’s a great advantage in a battle.” “Well, it’s a pain in my ass right now.” I miss Andarna. We’re so far apart that I can barely feel her. “Then shield him out the same way you do me—or start talking back,” Tairn
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There’s so much compassion, so much understanding in his eyes, that when he lets go of my waist, I think he might just let me stay. Then his hands are on my cheeks, sliding back to cup the base of my neck as he brings his mouth to mine. The kiss is reckless and consuming, and I give it my all, knowing it might be the last one. His tongue licks into my mouth with an urgency I return, angling to take him deeper. Gods, it’s not just as good as I’d been fantasizing about, remembering that night. It’s so much better. He was careful with me against that wall, but there is nothing hesitant about the
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“Quit telling Sgaeyl about my sleep habits,” I grumble at Tairn. “I’m not dignifying that demand with a response.” “Andarna is my favorite.” Tairn snorts.
“When exactly did you decide not to ruin me?” “Maybe it was when I saw Oren holding a knife to your throat,” he says. “Or maybe it was when I realized the bruises on your neck were fingerprints and wanted to kill them all over again just so I could do it slowly. Maybe it was the first time I recklessly kissed you or when I realized I’m fucked because I can’t stop thinking about doing more than just kissing you.” My breath catches at his admission, but he just sighs, lets his head fall back against the wall. “Does it even matter when, as long as it changed between us?”
“Don’t do that,” I whisper, and he lifts his head again to hold my gaze. “Don’t do what? Tell you I can’t get you out of my head? Or speak directly into yours?” “Either.” “You could learn to do it, too.”
Pretty sure I hear him drop something at the back of the room before he answers. “Chocolate cake. Stop being weird.”
“He cares for you. That’s already hard enough for him.” I scoff. “He cares about keeping me alive. There’s a difference.” “Not for him there isn’t.”
“Guess dragons hold grudges,” he finally whispers.
“Are we on offense or defense?” I ask Xaden. “Little busy right now.” “Oh no, am I distracting you?” A smile curves my mouth.
“If you don’t use it, I’ll take personal offense.” He folds his arms across his chest and studies the rigging. “Considering I had it made for you and just about got myself burned alive in the process of trying to get it on him.” He lifts a brow at Tairn. “Even though he helped design it, I might add.” “The first models were unacceptable, and you had the gall to pinch my chest scales when clumsily assembling it this morning.” Tairn’s golden eyes narrow on Xaden.
“How was I to know the leather from the prototype would burn so easily? And it’s not like there are a lot of manuals on fitting a saddle to a dragon,” Xaden drawls.
“He wasn’t amenable to me giving it a test flight.” “You can ride me when the flesh rots off my bones, wingleader.” Well, that’s descriptive.
“Fuck, that stubborn, feisty look always makes me want to kiss you.” Xaden’s expression remains bland, bored even, but his eyes heat as his gaze drops to my mouth. “And you say this now, where people will see if you actually do.” My breath catches. “When did I ever give you the impression that I give a fuck what people think about me?” A corner of his mouth rises, and now it’s all I can concentrate on, damn him. “I only care what they think about you.”
“Bet it would be even more awkward if I kissed you now, huh?” Yes, please. “The next time we kiss had better not be just to piss off Dain.” The next time had better only be because we want it. “Next time, huh?” His gaze lowers to my mouth again.
“Go lead your wing—or do whatever it is you do.”
“Lightning wielder.”
“Because I can’t seem to stay away.” He sounds anything but pleased by the admission, but my breath catches anyway.
“Because I only want you, Xaden.” The words breach something within him, and he gives. Finally.
my world narrows to this kiss, this minute, this man. Mine. In this moment, Xaden Riorson is mine.
“You walk into a room, and I can’t look away. I get anywhere near you, and this is what happens. Instantly hard. Fucking hell, I can barely think when you’re around.”
“Wanting you is not the problem here.” “Then what is?” “I’m trying to do the honorable thing and not take advantage of you after you’ve had a shit day.” His jaw flexes. I smile and kiss the side of his mouth. “It’s always a shit day around here. And it’s not taking advantage when I’m asking”—my teeth nip at his lips—“correction, begging you to make my day better.”
“Stop being so fucking honorable and fuck me, Xaden.”
I brush a kiss over his mouth, silencing him. “I know what you’re saying. It’s…sweet.” He nips at my skin. “I’m not sweet. Please don’t mistake any part of me for soft or kind. That will only get you hurt, and whatever you do…” He buries his face in my neck, inhaling deeply. “Don’t fall for me.”
“Don’t leave me.” “Never. I’ll burn him alive before he takes a single step toward you.”
“Well, then start there. Ground in your power and try to feel whatever it was you were feeling.” He goes back to his notebook. “Should I get the wingleader?” Tairn flat-out laughs in my head. “Shut up.”
“Get stronger in wielding, and you’ll be able to do it, too. There’s nowhere in existence you could go that I wouldn’t find you, Violence.”
Tairn chortles. “Not a single fucking word out of you,” I warn.
“You said not to fall for you. Did you change your mind?” “Absolutely not.” His jaw tenses. “Right.”
“You want me.” I put my hand on his chest and feel his heart pounding. “And I know that scares you even though I want you just as badly.”
“I’m over here keeping my hands and memories to myself because you asked me to, and you’re fucking me with your eyes. That’s not playing fair.”
“Told you to stop staring.”
“If you’d just man up and admit there’s something between us, I would strip down to my skin so you could see every single inch of me. And once I had you begging, I’d drop down to my knees, undo those flight leathers you’re wearing, and wrap my lips around—” Xaden chokes.
“You’re going to be the death of me.”
“You are a good friend, Liam Mairi.” I rest my head on his arm.
“Liam, you know I adore you, right?” “Well, that’s nice—” “Go away.” I walk straight ahead through the courtyard. “What?” Liam catches up to me. “I can’t just leave you out here by yourself.”
“No offense, but I can fry this entire place with a lightning bolt if I want to, and I need to see Xaden, so go.” I pat his arm and keep striding toward the feeling, using it to guide me. “I mean, your aim is shit according to you, but I get the rest!” he calls out, falling behind.
“Tell me he’s not out there,” I say to Garrick and Bodhi, whose features I can barely see in the moonlight. “I could tell you that, but I’d be lying,” Bodhi remarks, rubbing the back of his neck. “You’re not going to want to see him. Not tonight, Sorrengail,” Garrick warns with a grimace. “Self-preservation is a thing. Notice we’re not with him, and we’re his best friends.” “Yeah, well, I’m his…” I open my mouth and shut it a few times because…fuck if I know what I am to him. But the longing that holds my heart hostage, this driving need to be at his side because I know he’s suffering, no
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“I’m just…his.”
I’m in love with Xaden.
“You’re forgetting that I wield shadows, Violence. I’m just as safe out here as I am in the courtyard. Are you going to wield lightning to break your fall?” Fine. That’s a good point. “I…perhaps did not think that part through as thoroughly as you,” I admit. I wanted to be close to him, so I got close, parapet be damned. “You’re seriously going to be the death of me.” His fingers flex at my waist. “Go back.”
“Gods help me, I’m only looking at you.”
“I’m much better at this than I was last July.” “So I see.” He stays close, one hand on my waist as I walk the last part of the parapet. “In a fucking dress.” “It’s a skirt, actually,” I say over my shoulder, only feet away from the wall. “Eyes forward!” he grumbles, and it’s only the fear in his tone that keeps me from doing something arrogant like skipping the last few feet.
“Don’t ever put your life at risk over something as trivial as talking to me again.” It’s as low as a growl against my ear, sending a shiver down my spine.
“Next year is going to be so much fun,” I tease, walking forward and lacing my fingers with his so he follows.
“Liam will be here next year to make sure you’re not doing asinine things,” he mutters. “You’re going to love ...
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“Garrick and Bodhi were just here.” “They probably know I’m going to kill them for letting you out there. A dress, Sorrengail? Really?”
“Did you know that the first time I climbed these steps with Dain, I was horrified that there wasn’t a handrail?” “Did you know I can’t stand to hear his name on your lips while you’re leading the way to my room?”
“I don’t deserve you.” His arm curls around my hips and he tugs me closer. “But I’m going to keep you all the same.” “Good.” I lean in and brush my lips over his. “Because I think I’m in love with you.”
