I believe there would be far less fear of commitment if you could trust that you were committing to a Self-led relationship based on courageous love rather than to a process that requires the exiling of your exuberance. As the Jungian analyst Adolf Guggenbühl-Craig writes, “How often one observes how interesting, witty, and animated the married person is when alone, but then with the marriage partner present, every sign of liveliness vanishes.”5 That’s a steep price to pay for the false security of parts-based commitment.
