but also an intense drive to be redeemed—to have the caretaker who originally gave you the message that you are unlovable change their mind and tell you that they do indeed value you. This drive for redemption will be a major factor in your choice of mate because you will seek someone who looks, sounds, or acts like the original redeemer. You will be strongly drawn to someone who has certain similarities to one of your parents, if that person was the original redeemer.
