Children in the second group aren’t confused at all about why they feel bad. Their parents objectified them as unwanted burdens that have ruined their lives, scapegoats for their own failings, targets of their displaced rage, or sex toys to be used and discarded. Often these children not only carry the embedded message from the parent that they aren’t valued but they also blame themselves for creating the parent’s behavior. They ask themselves, Why would my mother be that way if there wasn’t something wrong with me? and conclude that there must be something wrong with them.
