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And in the middle of my chaos, there was you.
“Could always sleep in my bed. I’ll protect you.” “Dream on.” “Believe me, querida, I will.”
She’s…. light. She’s literal sunshine. And it makes a burst of anger shoot through me because I know that for so long, she was with someone who did nothing but dim her.
“You don’t talk about her,” I warn, my voice low and threatening and so deadly fucking serious. “You don’t look at her. You don’t even think about her. If you do, fucking trust me, I will make what I did to Dylan last night look like a fucking spa treatment. Okay?”
“I’m sorry I ruined your birthday, by the way.” “You didn’t.” It’s my turn to deadpan him. “My ex-boyfriend beat the crap out of you for talking to me.” “And the night ended with a pretty girl in my bed, fawning over me,” Nick retorts smoothly. “I’d call that a win.”
“Yeah,” Amelia muses, humor lightening her tone. “It would probably throw off your game if your groupies had matching uniforms.” “Amelia!” A choked laugh escapes Cass. “What?” She grins, wide and unabashed, her exhaustion suddenly moot. “A little teasing is good for him. Keeps his ego in check. Stops his big head from getting stuck in doorways.” Yeah. I’m fucked.
“Get what?” “I’m not sweet, Amelia.” he spits. “I don’t turn up at girls’ houses to watch movies. I don’t buy them lunch or bring them coffee. I don’t let them sleep in my bed or steal my clothes. I don’t get jealous when a guy so much as looks at them. I don’t get in fights with their ex-boyfriends. I sure as fuck don’t introduce them to my mother. I’m not that guy.” I swallow hard over a suddenly incredibly dry throat. “I don’t understand.” “Join the fucking club.”
“Sometimes, I find it hard to look at you,” he murmurs, “because you’re so fucking beautiful I can’t think.”
“You’re gonna fight someone for staring at my ass?” “Querida, I wanna fight people for staring at your face.” Amelia’s face scrunches up as she futilely tries to hide a smile.
“I need to leave because you are everywhere, all the time, and I can’t fucking think straight. I can’t fucking breathe, Amelia. I can’t stop wanting you and I hate it because you don’t want me.”
After living so long with a gaping hole in my chest, I am whole. The friends in this room, the man gripping my thigh and the brother with an arm slung across my shoulders filled the gap without even knowing it. I'm complete. Battered and bruised but no longer broken.
I need to let you go so that little part of me that still belongs to you can belong to them. Bye, Sam.
