ILYBSM: I Love You Both So Much

by J.E. Birk

They’re jammed or locked or I don’t know what. “So,” I say conversationally to the goat after he’s demolished a second apple I gingerly handed him, “now that we’re friends, can you tell me how to escape from this place? Because I hear you put Criss Angel to shame.” He doesn’t answer me, so I’m left with my thoughts. My thoughts and, like, eighteen animals. I swear, Jeb should open a petting zoo. That idea makes all kinds of synapses ping in my brain, but before I can process them, I hear the beautiful noise of rusty hinges squealing. The main door is wrenched open, and wind snakes inside the somewhat snug barn. Rather than Jeb or Embry, it’s Doug, who doesn’t look surprised to see me. “Hey!” I say. “How did you know to find me in here? Where’s Embry? Jeb?” The big firefighter holds up a hand and gives me a broad smile. “No one answered at the house, so I figured you were in one of the outbuildings.”