The Longest Race: Inside the Secret World of Abuse, Doping, and Deception on Nike's Elite Running Team

by Kara Goucher

The problem wasn’t the calories, it was the scarcity mindset, the idea of deprivation being a path to victory and heroism.

The truth is, running often attracts a personality type that gets high off extreme discipline.

The writer Anaïs Nin had it right when she noted that “shame is the lie someone told you about yourself.”

So much of the art of running is the ability to calm oneself at a moment of extreme pressure.

Psychologist Brené Brown talks about “overfunctioning,” meaning responding to stress by doing more than is necessary, which can numb the pain. “For overfunctioners,” says Brown, “it’s easier to do than to feel.” I’m one of those people.

Whether you’re an elite or a first-timer, that’s the magic of marathoning, the recognition of your own potential that had

been there all along. There was such satisfaction for me in hitting that first 18-mile long run, then 20-miler, and so on. Race day is fun, but training gives you moments of the extraordinary in the ordinary.

The largest seller of athletic footwear and apparel in the world, spending all that money to keep my abuser active in the sport. Remember that the next time you see a Nike ad or consider buying shoes or clothing with a swoosh on it.

If I’ve learned anything, it’s that change starts when good people refuse to stay quiet.