The Longest Race: Inside the Secret World of Abuse, Doping, and Deception on Nike's Elite Running Team

by Kara Goucher

The ritual of training for another marathon now felt like a refuge. I loved building up my fitness as I worked toward 115-mile weeks, experiencing the slow revelation of being in better shape than I had thought, still capable of more than I expected. Whether you’re an elite or a first-timer, that’s the magic of marathoning, the recognition of your own potential that had been there all along. There was such satisfaction for me in hitting that first 18-mile long run, then 20-miler, and so on. Race day is fun, but training gives you moments of the extraordinary in the ordinary.

In the wake of the SafeSport ban neither Nike nor Alberto acknowledged wrongdoing or offered an apology. To the contrary, Alberto and Nike filed an appeal of the decision. When asked during the appeal if Nike was backing him, Alberto first said yes, then quickly said no, he misspoke, and he was paying for the appeal on his own. However, Nike has allegedly spent millions of dollars defending Alberto across the various cases. The largest seller of athletic footwear and apparel in the world, spending all that money to keep my abuser active in the sport. Remember that the next time you see a Nike ad or consider buying shoes or clothing with a swoosh on it.

Running has been my source of inspiration, my religious practice, my way of interfacing with the world. It has taught me how to move and how to be in my body. It has nearly killed me. It has saved my life. It’s made me who I am. It’s made me happy. I’m still in love with it. I always will be.