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She smells like green grass, horses, and sweet summer freedom.
The saddest eyes I’ve ever seen.
What I don’t realize is that I’ll be fighting the urge to stare at Jasper Gervais for years to come.
And for Sloane I keep every promise, no matter how badly they hurt.
She’s spitting mad right now. Mad at me. But I think that’s just because she trusts me enough to let her anger out, and I’m okay with letting her. I’m happy to be that person for her.
I could do better. That’s what I really want to say. That’s what I’ve realized sitting here tonight. That I’m thinking things I shouldn’t be. Wanting things I can’t have. Because I’m too late.
Plus, I remember how Sloane looks at a man when she really wants him. And she isn’t looking at her fiancé the way she used to look at me.
Worst of all, the man I’m going to walk down the aisle toward isn’t the one I see when I close my eyes. He isn’t the one I’ve wanted for the better part of my life.
I realy hope she leaves him at the alter
“I said I’m not leaving. But you need to.”
“Over my dead body, are you marrying him.”
Get me the fuck out of here. I wanna go to the ranch.”
Deft fingers make quick work of the dainty silver buckles while I stand here slack-jawed, watching this man drop to one knee just to take my shoes off, running calloused palms reverently around my ankle as he tugs my feet free.
hes so hot
What kind of man stops in the middle of breaking me out of my sham of a wedding to rub my sore feet?
“Maybe if I drink enough of these”—I lift the six-pack, feeling a little loopy—“I’ll invite you to join me.”
“Beau is missing.”
nope. nope nope nope. this is a joke right?
Harvey’s haunted face staring at me from the kitchen table is one I’ll never forget. It’s seared into my memory, right beside the day my little sister died.
Everyone is anxiety drinking tonight.
Shame hits me. Not only am I the weird homeless kid whose parents left him behind . . . I’m now the most popular kid’s charity case.
stop im gonna cry
And just like that Beau Eaton cements himself as one of the very best things in my life . . .
I’m about to tell her I want to be alone, but when she wraps a blanket around my shoulders and plops down beside me, tucking herself in against me, my body releases a breath I didn’t even know I’d been holding.
He’s larger than life. He won’t go down without a fight. I have faith in him.”
I’d rather be barefoot in a dirty liquor store with you.”
“Nah, Sunny. You’re my only girl.”
I feel like I let Beau down somehow.
this is hurting my heart
The world is dark, but she’s like the moon when we sat on the roof. Bright and pure, shedding a silvery light over everything so that I can still see where I’m going.
“Sunny, I am so far from okay, it’s not even funny.”
love a man who actually opens up
“He’d get the fuck outta dodge and go do something for himself.”
the girl who always listens. The girl who’s always there for me. The girl I almost lost.
I know how it feels to lose someone you love, and I couldn’t do that to these people who’ve become my family. I’ll suffer before ever making them do the same.
He really did look like a big, dumb koala.
“Hell might actually be alright if we’re stuck there together, Sloane.”
“I’ll be sure to give you some notice so you can get your Viagra down in time, old boy.” “Oh, nah.” Harvey waves a hand dismissively. “The Eatons are a virile bunch. Even I don’t need those.”
He knows my anxiety about driving, vehicles, and accidents. It’s wild how one simple mistake can translate into such widespread anxiety.
hes just like me fr
Willa: You should bang him.
I FUCKING LOVE WILLA
I’d pay good money to come with Jasper Gervais.
me too
“It’s impossible to forget how long I’ve known you, Sunny,”
“Every fucking day, Sunny.”
And it’s one of my favorite things.”
“It’s your eyes.”
resisting the urge to reach out and touch her, to tell her how proud I am of her. To tell her she could be mine instead.
No, Sloane doesn’t need my approval. But goddamn, she has it anyway.
I’m too tired to focus on anything other than how the water is the exact color of Sloane’s eyes. I was wrong about the sky. I was wrong about the eggshell. It’s the glacier lake. I see her everywhere.
I drift off staring at the crystal-blue water. Daydreaming about the girl with crystal-blue eyes.
And I’ll never stop feeling responsible.
OH MY GOD?????
A little wild, a lot brave. There she is.
I’m so at peace in her presence. I always have been.
“I always worry about you, Jas.”
I’ve been staring at Jasper Gervais since I was ten years old, and suddenly . . . he’s staring back.
He doesn’t just listen to me. He hears me. He sees me.
Jasper: I don’t like talking to people. Sloane: You talk to me. Jasper: You’re not people. Sloane: Lmao. What am I then? Jasper: My person.
