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“Eyes on me, honey.”
After all, he’s Jasper. The boy with sad eyes and a heart of gold.
“See, Sloane? You can wear someone else’s ring, but we both know you’ve always been mine.”
I lie here thinking about how this entire night is quintessentially us. Highs and lows, pleasure and pain, happiness and sadness. Secrets and truths.
My Sloane.
Because no matter what else is going on in the world, everything is better with her in my arms.
I want to know. I always want to be the person who knows the most about him.
“I feel like I could crumble under the weight of not wanting to disappoint you. I’m paralyzed by my fear of losing you.”
“The thought of needing you this badly and letting you down.” He drops my gaze, shaking his head. “It fucking kills me.”
“You’re never going to lose me,”
“That’s what I want. That’s what I get off on. Telling you what to do and having you listen. Control.”
“Don’t you get it, Jas? I’ve seen all the darkest parts of you and I’m still here. I still want more. Stop trying to scare me away. It isn’t going to work.”
Stop holding back with me.”
“It’s always been you, Jasper. It will always be you.”
“Lose that fucking ring and crawl.”
“I’ve spent a long time thinking I don’t deserve you,”
“I don’t think I suffer from that way of thinking anymore. Suddenly I don’t really care about deserving you when it’s so damn clear you belong to me and always have.”
“I’m done sharing.”
“You can take it,”
“Tell me you’re mine, Sloane.”
“I’m yours, Jasper. I always have been.”
“And you always will be,”
There’s a special power in being able to make a person smile just by existing.
And when she turns around with Gervais written across her back? I smile behind the cage of my helmet. My name looks good on her too.
“The answer is no. None of that shit matters. Because we’re me and you. We’re us. Unlikely and inevitable all at once. We’re forever.”
Jasper: Sunny, you’ve always been my girl.
She’s the air I breathe and that fucking terrifies me. Because no matter how fiercely I love someone, I know they always leave.
Jasper: Thanks for the advice. Willa: That wasn’t advice. It was motivation. Willa: Also, you’ll never do better than her. I don’t care how famous you are.
Two weeks off of hockey compared to a few days without Sloane proved two things to me: I can live without hockey but I can’t live without Sloane.
My rock. My comfort. The boy with the sad eyes and the heart of gold.
“No, Sunny. I shouldn’t be scared. You’re the least scary thing in my life. You’re not just tattooed on my skin. You’re branded on my heart. Woven into the fiber of my being. The most constant and reassuring person in my life.
When I close my eyes, I see you. When you’re away from me, I dream about you. When I need someone to lean on, you are always there for me. God.
You’ve loved me when I haven’t even been able ...
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“Sloane, I won’t go without you.”
“I’m sorry you’re the only thing that’s ever made me feel whole again. I’m sorry I’ve needed so much from you. Sunny, I’m sorry I’m so damn late. But thank you for waiting.”
“I love you, Sloane Winthrop. I always have. I love you so damn hard I don’t even know what to do with it. You’re my person. And I think I’m yours too.”
Maybe not the family he was born into but the one that wanted him the most. The one that will do anything for him.
“Sloane Gervais sounds right, don’t you think?”
And just like that, the boy with the lanky limbs, the caramel hair, and the saddest eyes I’ve ever seen is mine.
“That when it comes to you, I’m powerless.”
