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It’s not that I don’t know how to talk to people or that I dislike people... well, I do dislike a lot of people. It’s just that something has always felt off. Like I don’t belong.
What is it with men thinking they have the right to touch a woman without their permission?
Sometimes I feel like I’m Diana’s guardian angel, but maybe more of a reaper. Because after what I heard, I’m ready to collect the soul that dared to hurt the person who means the most to me.
The last thing I hear before I go is a deep voice. A voice that would probably make others tremble, but it fills me with warmth. “It’s alright, love. You’re coming home now.”
“What do you want, demon?” I forgot that he doesn’t have to breathe to live, so crushing his windpipe doesn’t affect him the same way it would a mortal. I give him an evil grin. “Wrong, you can call me Devil if you’d like to address me.”
The being may have given me Lilith far sooner than I ever dreamed possible, but he hurt her, and that’s unacceptable.
“So that means I’m…” “In Hell,” I finish her sentence. “I’m in Hell, and you’re what?” she scoffs. “The Devil?” I keep my eyes fixated on hers. “I believe that’s one of the terms mortals use for me. I’d prefer for you to call me Lucifer, however.” Or sir, or any number of delicious things.
Because coming to terms with the fact that I find the fucking Devil to be the most handsome man I’ve ever seen is just not going to happen. I mean, does he have to be six-foot-nine and have thick, dark brown hair with eyes so dark they nearly look black? Every time he holds a glass with his long fingers, I want to scream. Or I have inappropriate thoughts of where he could put his hands on me.
Lucifer is menacing, just in a neutral state, but the way he’s looking at him… it’s as if he wants to cut his hands off for touching me. I like it more than I should.
“Any gift a demon possesses, it’s because I have that gift. Do you want to know what one of my favorite gifts is?” I shake my head no, but in my head, I think about all the gifts Kas has told me about. Astral projection, dream walking, fire, persuasion, shadows, strength, among so many others. And Lucifer holds all of these gifts? He leans down to whisper in my ear. “I can taste lies. And yours taste so fucking sweet.”
Who gave him the right to look so damn good in a suit?
He stills slightly after I say ‘sir’, and I can’t help but smirk. So the man likes it when I call him sir, not surprising from a control freak who calls himself the ‘king’ of Hell.
“I’m new to this whole demon thing. Is it the length of being a demon that makes you an insufferable cunt, or were you born that way?”
“Poor thing, it must be so fucking exhausting being so different from other girls.” I lean in closer to whisper in her ear. “And you have it all wrong, sweetheart. If anyone is getting on their knees, it will be Lucifer for me.”
“Eyes are up here, love,” he teases, and I swallow. I’m not going to look at Satan’s dick. I’m not going to look at Satan’s dick.
I mean, he’s huge, and he’s powerful, and he has a big dick. Why does the universe keep tempting me with this man? He’s my boss, for one; second, he’s an asshole; third, he’s the fucking Devil. I should hate him. I do hate him. He’s the manifestation of all the evil in the world… right?
I’m a demon. I’m everything she said I am, and I’m done fighting it. Done being sad and feeling less than because of what others think. I’m in Hell, and I’m ready to start living like it.
If I’m so fucking horrible, the villain, a monster? Then it’s about time I started acting like it.
“No, it’s not,” I retort. I won’t be someone’s whore again, I deserve more. He laughs and nods. “Mmm, you’d be more.” His hand cradles the back of my head, his fingers lacing into my hair and pulling with just the right amount of pressure. “I’d give you everything you wanted, love.”
“Only I can give you this, and you know it. You want to come, you want to dance. You come to me.” “But–” “Know that if I see you with another demon, you’re condemning them to death, Lilith. I don’t fucking share, and you belong to me whether you want to admit it or not.”
“You can’t just finger fuck a girl in a hallway and then not say anything. It’s rude.”
“I’m not good, but I wouldn’t say I’m evil either. Do I do as I please and step outside of what mortals and Heaven consider morally just? Sure. Am I the ruler of Hell? Yes. But as the ruler, my job is not only to manage the dead who come here but to ensure punishment for the most evil. I don’t condone certain behaviors because no one should. My soul is a deep shade of gray, and I’m okay with that.”
To my core, I am an unforgiving person, but there’s a piece of me that wants to forgive Lucifer... and myself. It doesn’t help that my subconscious wants to forgive him too. I keep dreaming about him. Sometimes they are down and dirty. He doesn’t talk much in those, and then other times, they are so sweet and domestic. I want to scream.
“I think of you every day. You consume me.”
“If I could touch you, love. I would be on my knees for you in a moment. I’ve missed you.”
What is an eternal life worth if I’m not able to spend it with the person who makes me feel alive? I’ve been floating through this existence, managing Hell and doing the duty that I was assigned. But she’s come back to me, and I’m very much trying to not fuck it up.
I can’t help when my mind wanders to what he was wearing when he saved me, how he was splattered in our enemies’ blood. He sullied his expensive outfit to avenge me—who said romance is not dead? Is there anything that’s more of a turn-on than being violently avenged by an attractive man?
It’s at that moment, Lucifer's stoic facade falls, he’s never been chosen by someone. Fate has always decided for him, and all he wants is for someone to care for him for who he is. I swallow thickly as I stare at him.
“It’s what she killed Lily with, said that if the dagger was ever awakened again that it would be her gift to me. A stronger version of Lily, a version that could handle my darkness and represent her forgiveness for what I had become.”
“So I’m your fated mate?” I groan as I admit what I’ve always held back. “I’ve felt it,” I admit to him, and he smirks. ”It’s like a tug against my heart pulling me towards you. I thought maybe I was just pathetically missing you, but it’s something more.” “It’s much more. It’s everything.”
“You won’t compare me to Lily?” I ask. He smiles and shakes his head. “There’s no comparison, love. My darkness calls to yours.”
His palm is wrapped around mine until he lets go. “Give ’em hell, love.” He steps away, and I turn to watch him. He casually props his large frame against the wall, just watching me. It hits me then that I’ve found someone who truly accepts me and that nothing I can do will scare him. I can be authentically me, and Lucifer won’t think I’m a monster or a bad person. If anything, he embraces this side of me that I’ve always hid away from. I bite my lip, and he nods at me, giving me his blessing.
“My lord, I didn’t mean it. Please forgive me. I made a mistake. I’ll do whatever you wish.” I take two steps forward, my heels clicking loudly against the cement floor as I stand before the demon who took my sister’s life. “He’s not the one you should be begging,” I tell him, and his gaze travels from my face to Lucifer’s in the corner. “My lord?” “You heard her,” he replies, and I have to shake off just how attractive that was to me.
She tugs me down by grabbing the lapels of my jacket and kissing me so fiercely that I don’t think about anything else. My guilt, my fears, they’re all gone; the only thing I can think about is this perfect creature is unequivocally mine.
“So fucking beautiful. My perfect,” I pause, kissing the side of her head. “Violent,” Another pause and another kiss, this one to the underside of her jaw. “Magnificent, little demon,” I finish.
Mortals spend all of their short, miserable lives searching for what they think Heaven will bring them. But I know if they got to experience even a fraction of what I just had, they would know utopia isn’t in the clouds but inside of a beautiful woman who means more than any world ever created.
“Come here.” I step in between his legs, and he holds me by my hips. “No words suffice for what you are to me, Lilith, but I’m far too fucking old to be someone’s boyfriend.”
I’m a fucking demon, and it’s about time this angel learns a goddamn lesson.
I want to be with someone who is proud to be with me. I want to be loved openly and honestly.”
I’m ready to finally start my life with my soulmate by my side and watching my daughters live their long and happy lives.
“I want to make myself crystal clear; if you in any way threaten me or my family, there will be no second chances. You will find yourself in the pit for all of eternity, or your soul will simply be destroyed.”
“I would like to announce the new Queen of Hell—prosecutor of crimes against women—Lilith.”
I don’t know what I was thinking by keeping her to myself. She was meant to be my equal, to entice fear in others. I told her that my darkness calls to her, and as I see the power she exudes, I know that we were truly fated to be together.
Lucifer, the Devil, Satan himself, is on his knees for another demon. But she isn’t just any demon. She’s my soulmate, my true counterpart, and she should be treated as such.
She looks like a beautiful fallen goddess, and I don’t think I’ll ever tire of seeing her this way.
“You taste like mine,” she says, and I can’t help but shiver. “You taste like sin, salt, and so completely mine.”
Eternity is forever, but I’m unsure if it will be enough.
“And this is our room now?” “Love, this is our room, our mansion. Fuck, this entire realm is ours.”
“This is the only variation of you I want. The past is irrelevant. Loving you in this life and sharing our future is all that matters to me.”
Lucifer—the Devil—is my soulmate, and I don’t care what anyone thinks about that. I don’t care if it makes me evil or a monster. Something this pure and cosmic could never be wrong.
