For the Fans

by Nyla K.

He’s so fucking cute. God, help me.

This thing was already complicated as fuck before. But now, with these stupid butterflies bounding around in my gut, it’s just turned into the biggest mess of my life. He bottomed… But I feel like I’m the one who’s fucked.

I love the way he looks way too much to think rationally.

I don’t want to hear his mouth anymore. I just want to taste it…

I might want to punish him, just a tad.

“Want more?” He nods fast. “Yes, please.”

“Tell me…” His voice trails off, and he gulps. I peer down at him, and his cheeks are all manners of flushed. “Tell you what?” He swallows visibly again, whispering, “Tell me you think I’m beautiful.”

But for right now, I can see the Kyran who comes back to me; the one who knocks on my door in the middle of the night and crawls into bed with me, awaiting something that only I can give him.

“Baby… You are so goddamn beautiful. I don’t think, I know.”

“You’re beautiful too, Avi. I think you’re… so fucking sexy.”

This isn’t just for the camera… I can tell. He’s actually feeling this.

“I mean, I know you are. You’re hot as fuck… and your body is… perfect.”

“Call me gorgeous again…” “Anything you want, gorgeous.”

“You’re so fucking pretty, baby.” I trace the curves of his pectoral muscle with my tongue. “Delicious… I could sink my teeth into you.”

“Your mouth feels… amazing.” “You like it when I kiss you everywhere, beautiful thing?”

“Baby, you’re ruining me…”

“Fucking wreck me.” “Whatever you want, baby.”

“It’s never been an accident with you, Kyran.” My eyes flutter shut, forehead dropping to his. “Was it an accident for you? When you called me baby…?” My head shakes. “It’s never an accident.”

“Should I… get dressed?” He shows me an almost ecstatic grin. “Yes.” His eyes glide over me once more and he whispers, “But keep wearing the jersey. Please.” Fuck me sideways, I’m going to swoon to death.

It just feels right, this whole thing. Being with him…

Oh crap… Has his smile always been that beautifully radiant? Are those hearts floating around his head??

“Are you sniffing me?” I peer down at him. “I like your smell, so what?”

“You realize you’ll be expelled…” Dean Perkins says, tilting her head. “Permanently.” Avi nods. “That’s fine. Because I don’t regret it.” His eyes shift to mine, and he whispers, “Best thing I’ve ever done.”

don’t think I can fight it anymore, Avi…” My breathing shallows. “Fight what?” “Us…” The gold and green in his eyes glow, offering me a timid sparkle. “Baby, I think I’m in love with you,”

“I’m in love with you,” I murmur, and his body shudders in my hands. “And I’m pretty sure I have been since the moment we met.”

“God, I missed you so bad, baby…”

“I know… I’m sorry I was pushing you away for so long.” “You’re worth the wait, gorgeous,”

“Say it first, Kyran,” he whispers in my ear. I roll my eyes, but my smile is seriously bordering on psychotic. “I love you, Avi.” “Mmm… I love you, HGB.” “You’re an annoying idiot.” I bite the grin off my lips, and he laughs. “That’s my man.”

I’m gay, and I’m in love with my stepbrother. There it is. Wow… This must be what really great drugs feel like.

“I am.” Avi shrugs, and when I glare at him, he winks at me, leaning in closer. “I told you, baby… I’m obsessed with you.”

Over the years, I’ve relied heavily on smoking mass amounts of weed in order to combat my anxiety. Turns out, I was numbing myself so much, I wasn’t even sure if I could feel anything

“We’re together,” I speak quietly, then straighten. “He’s my boyfriend. I’m his…” My voice trails, and I peek at Avi, watching his lips slope into a timid smile. “I’m his boyfriend.” “You’re so much fucking more than that,” he breathes, and my heart jumps as I reach for his jaw. “I know,” I sigh,

“My baby,”

No matter what happens… it’s us.

“Right now, I just want to celebrate the win with my friends. And my boyfriend.”

This is my curse, my infinite burden that fucking scumbag saddled me with. As if it wasn’t enough… What he did to me. And now I have to walk around like this for the rest of my life, either holding in the truth, or worrying that the people who know will look at me like a victim.

I’m telling you, I love you, Kyran Harbor. Anything in the world that you want, I will give to you. But not just right now… Always

“Baby, you are so beautiful,”

“You drive me crazy, gorgeous thing,”

You’re mine, baby. I’m not giving you up, ever. No matter what.”

But the truth is that I’m in love with him. I’m so crazy in love with him, and I just want to be with him…

I’m in love with Avi Vega, wholly, truly, un-fucking-deniably.”

Because I don’t want, I need to kiss him right now. More than I need air in my lungs.”

I’m in love with an angel… And his name is Avi.

“There is no happiness for me without you.”

“Okay, yes. I’ve been in love with you for a while… clearly.”

“I’m sorry for all the time I wasted being scared,” he whispers. I shake my head. “Don’t ever apologize for that. You’re worth all the time in the world, baby. I would’ve waited years for you.”

He peeks at me over his shoulder. “I’m like… stupidly in love with you.” “Baby… I’m fucking moronically in love with you.”

“My love,”