Dark Harmony (The Bargainer, #4)

by Laura Thalassa

To be fair, I have been entertained. Des has spent most of the past hour plaiting one guard’s hair into at least fifty braids—he hasn’t yet noticed—and moving branches into another guard’s way. “Motherfucking trees,” the fairy mutters under his breath. “I swear they’re moving in my way.”

“You will refer to the sorceress from here on out as My Great Goddess of Fuckery and Other Magical Things. Understood?”

Oh Dark Queen Who Thinks I’m a Douchebucket of the Most Epic Proportions.”

“Galleghar O’Malleghar, King of Asshats, Killer of Boners, Wannabe Emperor Who Needs to Eat a Bag of Dicks and Die.”