Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids

by Kim John Payne

When your children are young, let the world of doing be their domain. There was no real help for Sophia’s dilemma except to let the lion leave the fraidy-cat behind on the driveway. That bike had to be ridden; words wouldn’t have helped. Often when young children feel emotional about something—when they’re angry or hurt or sad—they need to put it right by doing. They need to have a hug or give one, to dig a hole or find the dog, they need to draw a picture with a lot of green in it, or make something. They need to work it out by doing. If they need to talk, it helps to know that you’ll listen. They might need to throw something (hopefully not at their sister), to throw it again and perhaps again, until they’ve made a game where one bounce is a win but two means you’ve fallen into molten lava. They need to engage in the world, to put the feeling right in some physical way. And with that, sometimes they may need a bit of help.