Hidden Scars (Darby U Hockey Boys, #1)

by Andi Jaxon

I will not panic. I will not panic. I will not panic.

“Charles. Control.”

I already hate this mother fucker!!!

“If you would behave, I wouldn’t have to hurt you, Charles. I just want what is best for you.

What kind of fucked up manipulation is this snit!! Ima through this!!!

Make miracles happen while dancing with the devil.

Charles Preston Carmichael

Real name

The room goes silent,

Charles Preston Carmichael. My head goes blank. Empty.

He’s expected to be the first defensive draft...

On the ice he’s brutal, focused, angry, a...

“He’s your new roommate, Albrooke.”

I’m soaping myself up, ignoring the fact that there’s hot, naked, muscular, wet jocks around me,

Defiantly Gay!!

Shit. What if Carmichael is a giant homophobe?

The guy standing in my doorway is staring at me. Hard.

Unblinking.

I will not be made to feel less-than because of my sexuality.

I don’t understand what I’m seeing here. Who is this guy?

I wonder how long it’ll take for the boyfriend to give me the “don’t touch” speech.

He’s cute when he’s got some backbone. Too bad I don’t have time for distractions.

Lookie there, a bit more back bone. My dick almost takes notice.

Why do I want to break that strength?

Hmm. I do love the fight.

Something about him has my fingers itching to touch, but I can’t.

“Have you already forgotten your manners? Watch your fucking mouth.”

Alone is safe.

That breaks my heart!!! My poor baby

“Sloppy footwork, Albrooke,”

He's such a bitch and I am in forit!!!

the only thing I can focus on is how much I want to come. And Preston Carmichael.

I hate that he’s hot. That I want to feel him against me.

Right you " hate him surezee

He doesn’t know you were thinking about him, dumbass. Relax.

Take that, fuck head.

Is Preston an aggressive kisser?

Asking permission is not what I want. I want him to hold me down and take what he wants, but he’s too nice for it.

Why is my dick getting harder?

I hate my skin. The scars that mar my body. Proof of my fuck-ups and the twisted mind of my father. There’s never a time I can just pull my shirt off. I’m always aware of the way my shirts fit, preferring to tuck them in most of the time to keep my body covered.

Sorry, chick, I’m not interested.

images of Jeremy Albrooke coming running on repeat in my mind's eye.

Current Jeremy is riding the orgasm high of his life.

Cut. Get a hold of yourself, the pain will help.

Jeremy liked when I touched him.

You’re a freak for enjoying it. He didn’t want you to touch him but you did it anyway. Monster.

No one will ever want you. No one will love you.

This hurts! I'm gonna cry!!!

I hate how Brendon touches Jeremy.

I hate it even more that I want to be the one touching him.

Or when you had Jeremy pushed up against the dresser… Fuck off, brain.

Doesn’t matter that I want to curl up with him against me.

Roll over. You aren’t safe like this. Your back is exposed.

What in the trauma response is that

No one wants to spend time with you. You’re useless. After all the time Father spent trying to fix you…

Why would he care?

Because you are lovable!!!

You didn’t hate the way he touched you.

He touched you like he owned you and you loved it.

“If I was going to molest someone in their sleep, sucking on a man titty wouldn’t be my first move.”