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“Too fucking far away from you,”
“You’re going to get a relationship gut and blame it on me.” “I wouldn’t give a shit,”
“You will love me anyway,”
“Tobias, you don’t have to quit. I told you when you got here. I won’t let you. The work you’re doing is too important to the people who rely on you, and it matters to you.”
“Why don’t you just say what you want to say?” “This isn’t you.” “No? Fine, what would please you?” “It’s not about pleasing me.” “Isn’t it? You seemed to have some preconceived notion about me and this life with you. I guess I’m not living up to it.” “I have no notion. That’s the point.” “And I’m telling you, I’m exactly where I want to fucking be.”
“I’m not going to act like I’m not having a hard fucking time not being in control—or in the know—but the least you can do is admit to me that this isn’t what you see for yourself permanently. You’re hiding because I hurt you. Your confidence took a blow because I broke your heart, again.”
The front door slams minutes later, and I know he’s gone for another run.
“Methinks the lady doth protest too much.” “Methinks you’re going to lose some baby teeth if you don’t shut your fucking mouth.”
“Pussy, pussy, pussy, pussy, and . . .” he holds a finger on his thumb, “yup, I’m going to have to go with pussy.”
“No, little brother,” I say, as flashes of my own blueprints flit through my mind, and I reveal the true reason as to why he’s needed here. “You’re the horse. And—” I give them all a pointed look—“as of this moment, I no longer exist.”
Eleven fucking days of flannel pajamas. And just to pour salt into my weeping dick, she leaves the door open when she showers, when she changes, and when she slathers her insanely toned body in a scent so alluring to me, I get hard when she breezes by. Well played, queen.
years, and I’ve never in my life been so hungry.
that I knew I was irrevocably in love with my enemy’s daughter.
“I didn’t come here to play fucking roommate.”
“You’re playing on a weakness we both have, Trésor.”
“You want slow?” I run a finger through her soaked lips and am rewarded with the buck of her hips. “Fine, we’ll go slow, though I don’t see the fucking point because I’m not the only one you’re punishing. But since we’re laying down the law—” I press a thumb to her clit, massaging it briefly before taking it away. She hisses through her teeth, eyes flickering with impatience. “Lover, boyfriend.”
“Not your fucking roommate.” I lick her soundly from center to top, sucking her clit briefly to earn my first plea. “The man in your life, your partner, your soulmate, your other half.”
“You want to take things slow, Trésor? Is that what you want? All these years apart wasn’t enough? If I seem eager—”
“If I seem eager, it’s because I want to erase every touch that wasn’t mine.”
“I love you,” I murmur and instantly see her eyes soften. “I’ve missed you so fucking much, so much.”
It cost me my sanity and my soul. “I can do slow, but don’t deny me my rightful fucking place.”
I love her beyond limits because she loved me through what I forced her to endure. She loved me, though I made us impossible.
“Faite pour moi.” Made for me.
“I won’t pretend to know how I hurt you or what it felt like when I did, Cecelia. But I do know how much it hurt me, and that’s enough to know I deserve your anger and caution. But right now, I need you too goddamn much to stay away when you’re right fucking here in front of me. When you are who you are, which is, in case you’re wondering, the other fucking half of me. I’m sorry for the things I’ve done, but it’s time you let me show you how much.”
Emotions, namely love, can make even the strongest man weak, giving opponents leverage. Leverage I never intend to let another have on me.
“Seven,” I reply. The number of years I’ve been away from what’s most important to me. The number of years I’ve been living dual lives. Years of hunger and humility, years of metamorphosis that changed me from a revenge-seeking orphan to a common thief, to barterer, brother, mentor, student, teacher and now . . .?
speaks up. “What did we win?” It takes several seconds for the panic to give way to exhilaration. Liberation gives a bounce to every step I take as I make my way back inside, forgoing my waiting date at the bar to collect my winnings. “Exodus.”
“Well, at the moment, I’m just crossing off the honey-do the Mrs. left for me and picking up toilet paper. And tonight, after I’ve scooped up enough dog shit, she might just reward me with a kiss goodnight after another day of pointless fucking living.”
know I’m sorry isn’t enough, man. I’m sending two straight from Tyler.
Tobias: This is not our story, Cecelia. This is not our fucking story!
And I have fucking whiplash.
“I’m jealous. Of. A. Dog.”
“I didn’t think it was possible to miss you more than I did before I got here, but I do. And I want to fuck you so bad.” The ache in that declaration and his tone is comical, but the sentiment hits hard. “Wow. Okay. You get points for honesty.”
“Does it hurt?” “Stop, look at me.” I do, and in his gaze, I see nothing but yearning. “I want to live here.” “You are living here.”
“I’m existing here, but we can make a life here if that’s what you want. I’ll give you whatever you want. Dream with me again, Cecelia. Dream a thousand more dreams with me, and I will make them all come true. I can give you promises. Promises I couldn’t before.” “Tobias—” “I don’t want to be your goddamn thorn or the moon you cry for!”
“You still love me,” he whispers, watching my face intently. “But you don’t want to love me anymore,” he says mournfully before brushing his thumb over my lips. “Tu es si belle.” You’re so beautiful. “I never thought I’d find you, and when I did, you weren’t mine.”
“I’ve wanted to reach out so many times since that day.” I nod as Cecelia intercepts. “You’ve met her? You’ve met my mother? When?”
“What’s important now,” I referee, “is that we’re together, for good.”
make a mental note to see how far away she is from her sugar pill days in her birth control.
“Look at me, baby.” Cecelia lifts her blazing eyes to mine, so much hurt shining in them, I want to shield her with my body. “What hurts you, hurts me.”
“Since when?” “Since the first time I laid eyes on her.” “Which was?” “When she was eleven.”
“It must have been hard supporting three children every month.”
“Those boxes saved us, sometimes for months at a time. I can safely say that act of kindness inspired me to pay it forward in a major way.”
“Come on out, Mon Trésor, I know you’ve been listening.”
“I’m leaving that up to your daughter,” I say honestly. “She’ll be the one to decide.”
“Are you on your sugar pills?”
“Don’t you fucking dare!” I boom. “I’d rather you take that fucking Beretta from your purse and shoot my cock!”
“We just relived every bad fucking thing that happened between us, Tobias. I think it’s best we just stop talking.”
“If you so much as stick a toe in those goddamn pants, you’re declaring war, and all bets are off!”
“Well, welcome to the fucking club, Frenchman! Good to see we’re finally on the same page!” “Anything but. We’re not even in the same fucking place anymore.” “Fine with me.” She points to the door. “You know the way out.”
