8 Rules of Love: How to Find It, Keep It, and Let It Go

by Jay Shetty

Solitude helps you recognize that there is a you before, a you during, and a you after every relationship, forging your own way even when you have company and love.

People determine how to treat us in large part by observing how we treat ourselves. The way you speak about yourself affects how people will speak with you. The way you allow yourself to be spoken to reinforces what people think you deserve.

You want to go on a journey with someone, not to make them your journey.

Karma will bring you the same lesson through a different person again and again until you change.

Sometimes, we assume trust is binary: either we trust someone, or we don’t. But trust increases gradually through actions, thoughts, and words. We shouldn’t trust someone instantly just because they’re kind to us. We give them our trust because little by little, day after day, we have shared more of ourselves and seen what they do with our honesty.

the happiest couples are those who can move past their initial obsession with each other to prioritize their own pursuits and goals.

no matter how compatible a couple is, to live in conflict-free bliss isn’t love, it’s avoidance.

Instead of looking at it like you’re taking sides against one another, frame the conversation as if it’s the two of you together taking on the problem.

Being right validates us. It gives us someone else to blame. It makes us feel secure in our beliefs and assumptions. We don’t need to change or take any responsibility.

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.

You’re never going to perfect love in this life, and that means you get to practice love every day of your life.

When we encounter someone whom we find difficult to be around, the first step toward loving them is to understand what, if anything, our reaction to them reveals about ourselves.