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but there’s a recurring dream where he knocks on my door and asks if I’m coming, and I never hesitate, I just take my coat and follow him. I don’t even look back.
whenever I’m in the grips of a fever or infatuation there is no confusion; my “self” recedes and gives space to a nameless joy, a unified whole that preserves all the details, inseparable and distinct, next to one another.

