Pumpkin Spice and Not So Nice
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Read between October 11 - October 13, 2024
2%
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was the one before the true love, which makes me a pre-love. The rehearsal love. The before true love.
5%
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living vicariously through the Turkish dramas Josie and I are obsessed with. Can Yaman, you have my heart.
Gretchen
Holy HELL. That is one good looking man.
5%
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Our moms really are the ruiners of joy.
6%
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her drawn-on eyebrows looking extra high today. She’s taught me many things, but the cautionary tale about overplucking her brows in the late 90s has been some of her most important work.
13%
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I could have lettered in kissing boys in high school if that were a thing—
19%
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Why? I regretted it instantly. I sometimes wish I could push a back arrow on my life, or an undo button. Give myself a chance for a redo.
22%
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I’ve worked at the pumpkin patch since I could carry a pumpkin. Which was around three. Child labor laws are ignored on a family farm.
22%
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hard one to crack. Talking to him feels akin to trying to get water from a cactus.
27%
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You’ll replay a lot of conversations in your mind and dwell on lots of things you wish you would have or could have said. Try not to waste your brainpower
27%
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It’s painted white, with a sign that says Hot Cider hanging just above the window where we pass out warm drinks to customers. It smells like a little bit of heaven with that lovely scent of cinnamon filling the space and the surrounding area.
27%
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Do they bring a change of clothing with them? Are they just so uptight that not even dirt wants to be near them?
28%
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The kid has an impressive vocabulary for being nearly two and a half—I’ll give him that. I’m not sure why he needs to learn about anatomy at this age but leave it to my sister to make sure he’s properly educated
28%
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and using the right wordage. No “hoo-has” or “ding-a-lings” or “private parts” for her.
28%
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The fart jokes are mostly to annoy my sister, who apparently has no
28%
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gastrointestinal tract, since she’s never let one rip in her entire life, or so she would have us think.
28%
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I aim to annoy, like a little sister should.
29%
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don’t get paid to work on the farm. That is a family obligation. I’m still paying off my debt to my mother for having to birth and raise me. A fact she brings up often.
30%
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mean face. She’s perfected the craft—many a person has been frightened by her glare.
37%
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says in that gruff tone of his. It’s growing on me. It’s sort of Vin Diesel meets Oscar the Grouch.
39%
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The rows of pine trees on the hills are dotted with aspens turning yellow and the cottonwoods changing to shades of orange. It’s a lovely sixty-five degrees,
47%
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we don’t have time for steps. We need long jumps or pole vaults.
49%
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Dana Peterson flared nostrils of disappointment look.
57%
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that cologne he uses—woodsy paired with a dash of citrus.
59%
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“So,” I say, and then sniffle for no reason.
59%
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He clears his throat. It’s our old standby. The soundtrack to this
60%
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ten-second hug can actually produce oxytocin.
60%
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If I can provide the world with more stress-relieving hormones by hugging, then I will.
66%
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I think everyone should have to, at some point in their life, work in a customer service–related job.
66%
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It’s important to see the other side of things, to understand what people in this position have to deal with. It would make for a much kinder world, in my opinion.
70%
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I want someone open and willing to tell me things. Not someone I have to pry information out of.
70%
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think sometimes the universe puts you in the same situations again to see if you’re still an idiot. Clearly, I am.
71%
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moving around this place like a crack-fed Energizer Bunny.
73%
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My dad has always opened any door for my mom.
82%
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why. “How about you tell me why Aspen
87%
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“She returned something to me that I’d lost a month ago, and I think I fell for her then.”
88%
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But Later Today Jenna can deal with the emotional fallout from that.