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Jenna Peterson’s Guide to Dating Emotionally Unavailable Men: When dating an emotionally unavailable man, get ready for disappointment. Because there’s going to be a lot of it.
I was the one before the true love, which makes me a pre-love. The rehearsal love. The before true love.
It’s like I have a sign on my head that says, Dump your problems on Jenna! Which makes me a magnet for emotionally unavailable men.
Don’t be fooled into believing that emotionally unavailable men don’t have deep feelings. They have a lot, in fact, but they don’t know how to show it. So get your shovel out and hone those detective skills, because you’re going to have to dig deep to find them.
It’s important that you have a lot of patience when dating an emotionally unavailable man. Try channeling the Dalai Lama for help.
Saying thank you is hard for a man if he’s not in touch with his feelings. Don’t take it personally even if you really, really, really want to.
In the beginning of the relationship, you’ll find that you have to do most of the talking until they feel comfortable opening up. So bring a lozenge.
Looking for flaws is one of their specialties.
“It’s hard to lose someone you love.”
“It sort of feels like something’s missing in my life, you know?”
“It’s like you’re still you, but not who y...
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You’ll replay a lot of conversations in your mind and dwell on lots of things you wish you would have or could have said. Try not to waste your brainpower on it.
to
Don’t expect apologies. They are about as frequent as actual sightings of bigfoot.
I’m still paying off my debt to my mother for having to birth and raise me. A fact she brings up often.
The key to getting someone to open up is to meet them on their level. Find out their interests and know that you will likely find them boring.
“I wanted to teach high school math and coach football.”
You may find that you will learn more about them through texting or other nonconfrontational ways of communication. A good phone plan and solid Wi-Fi are important.
Asking for a commitment will be like trying to get blood from a stone. Expect excuses.
When attempting to offer help, you will get resistance. Persistence is key.
“You did well, young Padawan,”
Trying new things that are deemed uncomfortable may not be well received.
I think sometimes the universe puts you in the same situations again to see if you’re still an idiot. Clearly, I am.
Relationships are hard, but when you’re with someone who’s emotionally unavailable, they can be draining. Like the suck-the-life-out-of-you kind of draining.
I’m acting like the last week didn’t happen. My feelings are still hurt, of course. But that’s on me. Aidan’s done nothing wrong. He’s never promised me anything.
“She returned something to me that I’d lost a month ago, and I think I fell for her then.”
When someone emotionally unavailable opens up to you, listen with your whole heart. It’s a big deal.
The things Aidan saw in me . . . those are the things that matter. But if I’m not willing to talk about the small things, then I’m probably not talking about the big things either.
If you hang on, someone who’s emotionally unavailable may start to come around. But remember: real change happens from within.
Relationships aren’t perfect—I know this. Arguments happen, and feelings get hurt. But the one between Aidan and me is the real deal, and it feels pretty perfect to me.
