Pumpkin Spice and Not So Nice

by Becky Monson

Jenna Peterson’s Guide to Dating Emotionally Unavailable Men: When dating an emotionally unavailable man, get ready for disappointment. Because there’s going to be a lot of it.

You made me see things I hadn’t seen before. You’ve helped me so much. I’m a different man because of you. I can never thank you enough. But you just aren’t enough for me.

It’s like I have a sign on my head that says, Dump your problems on Jenna! Which makes me a magnet for emotionally unavailable men.

This is how it works for me: I meet a man. He’s emotionally unavailable. I’m instantly attracted to said man. We start dating. I help him explore his emotions because of aforementioned gift and/or toxic trait. He feels his feelings, tells me how important I am in his life, and then breaks up with me. Then he takes his newfound emotionally open existence and finds the woman of his dreams and they live happily ever after.

Saying thank you is hard for a man if he’s not in touch with his feelings. Don’t take it personally even if you really, really, really want to.

Don’t expect apologies. They are about as frequent as actual sightings of bigfoot.

I think sometimes the universe puts you in the same situations again to see if you’re still an idiot. Clearly, I am.