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May 9 - May 24, 2023
The king knew, in this moment, that his greatest love would also be his ruination, and that both would come in the unlikely form of a young human woman.
No mortal is brave in the face of an untimely death.
“I can’t do that, Oraya.” “Why?”
Why? Because if I let you go, I’m committing treason against my own throne. Because if I let you go, I’ll have no choice but to fight against you out there. Because if I let you go, you become my enemy in earnest. And I can’t kill you, princess. I’ve tried. I can’t.
I raised my palms. “Fine. I admit it. You keep me on my toes, too. I’ve never been better than I was when I was with you.”
Tonight, I had seen her smile—really smile—for the first time in more than a month. And Goddess, it did something to me. It was like witnessing a rare natural phenomenon.
I never knew something could look so beautiful flying away.
Pain was simple. Pleasure was complicated.
When he dragged his fingernails across my skin, the almost-moan that slipped from my teeth was too sudden to control. He made a returning sound, too, something between a growl and a groan, and suddenly I was slumped back against him, the hard muscle of his body against my back.
“I dream about that sound.”
“And what the hell was that supposed to be?” I said. “Was that supposed to be a mercy? You dying for me?”
“I—” “I dream about my blade going into your chest every fucking night, Raihn.”
“You made me kill you,” I ground out. “You made me do what you couldn’t do. For the second time in my life I—”
“You sound so disappointed, my murderous queen.”
“You are everything,” he choked out, voice ragged. “Everything. So go, Oraya. Go.”
“You have nothing but me,” I said. “And yet, you’d let me go?” “I have nothing but you,” he murmured. “So I am letting you go.”
“Fuck you, Raihn,” I whispered. “Fuck you.” He took me in for a long moment, unblinking. And we broke that suspended silence at the same time. I didn’t know who moved first. The kiss was like a thunderstorm over the summer desert—a torrent that swept in all at once, obliterating the heat, so all-consuming that suddenly you remember nothing but the rain. All at once, he was everywhere.
“And for fuck’s sake, princess, I’m begging you, let me go to my knees for you.”
I blinked and felt a tear streak down my cheek. Raihn settled beside me. He wiped the tear away with his thumb.
“I hate you,” I choked out.
He kissed me on the forehead. “I know, princess,” he whispered. “I know you do.”
“You have destroyed me,” he murmured. “And I have hated every moment of it, too.”
“Let me kiss you,” he whispered. Begging, still. “Yes,” I whispered.
I give you my body, my blood, my soul, my heart.
Goddess fucking help me. I was destroyed. I was done.
“Loving someone else is a dangerous thing,”
“I love you,” he said, in a single, urgent breath. “I just—I need you to know that. I love you, Oraya.”
“Raihn. I forbid you to die on me. Do you understand? Get the fuck up. You swore to me—you swore—”
Death is not the enemy. Death is a natural continuation of life. An intrinsic part of fate.”
“So you missed me.” Arrogant prick, I thought. But aloud I said, “I love you.”
