I Choose Darkness

by Jenny Lawson

most of us had to make our own costumes out of what we had in the house, which is why so many of us were dressed as hobos.

Looking back now, it seems strange that I spent so much of my childhood on alert for roving satanists and unmarked quicksand, neither of which ended up being nearly as much of a problem in my real life as I had been led to believe.

Me: But I need to finish Netflix. My editor: Finish what on Netflix? Me: Just finish Netflix. All of it. I think I’m close. My editor: You can’t finish Netflix. Me: Well, that sounds like a challenge. Also, clearly you haven’t had the same pandemic I have.