Highest Bidder (Salacious Players Club, #5)

by Sara Cate

Clearly, I love Daddy’s cock.

This time it’s someone I care about—someone I love.

Just staring at her, the weight of the conversation I just had heavy on my mind, I realize that I’m in love with Daisy. Helplessly. Hopelessly. Foolishly.

If I had my way, I’d make her mine forever. I’d never let this one go.

Then, the rest of our lives can start.

He kisses me like he wants to savor me. Like he wants me to feel him. He kisses me with his whole soul.

I want to tell him he doesn’t have to commit it to memory. I’ll be like this for him whenever he wants. Forever.

It’s like Ronan has become my god and I can do nothing but obey. Somewhere in this abyss of pleasure, I lose sense of myself entirely.

I’m in love with her. Absolutely out of my mind, twisted up, and drunk on this thing between us. This relationship that didn’t exist a month ago but has single-handedly breathed new life back into this old man. This bond is nothing like what I felt before—ever. My heart has been through a lot, but it’s never met its match like it has with Daisy.

Her lips part and I wait for her to speak, but I know that if she doesn’t return the sentiment, that’s okay. I don’t love her to get love in return. Just feeling it is enough. Breathing life into the emotion coursing through my veins.

“Marry me.”

That’s the last thing I was expecting LMAOOOO

“I know it sounds crazy, baby girl. And maybe it is. But I want to take care of you. And I want you to be taken care of for the rest of your life. When I’m gone, you’ll never want for a single thing.” “I’ll want you,” she replies softly and without hesitation, another tear spilling over. “Ronan, I don’t care about the money or any of that.”

“I’m asking because I love you. Daisy, you brought the color back into my life. You with all of your poetry and music and happiness. I know I should meet your family and buy you a ring. I know this is all happening so fast, but I love you like fucking crazy. And I want to marry you.”

“Yes,” she stammers with a small laugh. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”

Really should’ve told him your secret first, but WOO HOO

Draft a new will. Put her name on the account. Make an appointment with the jeweler for a ring.

There’s not a safer place in the world than in his arms.

And maybe that’s what love is—feeling unworthy and astonished that the man you think is the greatest person alive wants you. What a gift a love like that is.

All we need is each other. All I need is her.

“I mean it, baby girl. Mine to take care of. Mine to keep. Mine to fuck. Mine to love.”

After a few moments of heavy breathing, I hear Eden on the other side of the room. “Well, that was fucking beautiful.”

But she’s right. Because every moment that I spend coddling and nurturing the girl I love, I’m thinking about how much I hated bringing her pain. Even if she loved it. Even if she came twice. Even if she needs it. It pains me to think I can’t give my girl everything she needs.

When Daisy is with me, I want her to always be well-rested, well-fed, and well-fucked.

So then why am I such a fool when I’m in love? Why do I fall so easily? Give away my heart at every opportunity?

IM SOBBING

I wish I never got on that stage in the first place, so I would have never known what it’s like to be loved by Ronan Kade.

“Daisy Moon,” my mother barks. “You could write a song about burgers and milkshakes, and it would be perfect.” “You’re just saying that because you’re my mom,” I argue. “I did not come back from California to hear you talk badly about my favorite songwriter. As soon as we get home, you’re playing me those new songs.”

“If I happen to meet someone, then sure. I’d get married again. But I don’t need to. A man isn’t responsible for making you happy, Daisy. I love my life the way it is right now. I’ve got you.”

Two nights ago, I was going to marry her. I wanted to. I still want to.

“Goodbye, Ronan,” she whispers, and I swear I don’t breathe again until she’s gone. As long as she’s not in my arms, I don’t want to breathe at all.

Daisy Two months later

This is just hateful

But it turns out convincing yourself that someone else has it worse doesn’t actually make you feel better. Because sadness is just…all around. And I don’t mean in just these meetings, but everywhere. No one is really immune or safe from sadness. No one has perfect, poetic lives.

I also had to accept that love could be just a memory, and it wouldn’t make it any less perfect or significant.

My mother loved me so much, she walked away from the man of her dreams. She walked away from real love. But she came back a happy woman. It might sound sort of weird, and I don’t share this part with my grief group, but knowing that I fell for the same man my mother did made me feel strangely close to her. Without thinking about the gross parts, of course. I love that her heart beat for the same person mine did, and that means something. Like she’s still here.

I fell in love with a man thirty-five years older than me. Who happens to be a billionaire. Who also happens to be the most romantic, passionate, caring, down-to-earth, perfect man—no, perfect person—I’ve ever known.

“She called me her favorite songwriter. So I know she’d be really proud.” “She is proud,” one of the older women in the group adds, and I grin at her.

But one face stands out. Sitting at the bar, a glass of bourbon in his hands, he watches me with a warm, comforting expression. Suddenly, I remember that day on the street in Paris. Just play for me, he said. So, that’s exactly what I do. I imagine there’s not another soul in the room, just his rich chestnut eyes and the proud look on his face. If I’m just playing for him, I couldn’t screw this up if I tried. “Thank you,” I mumble into the mic, and the crowd quiets to a low hush. “My name is Daisy Moon. And this song…is called ‘The Highest Bidder.’”

“Pretty good?” I snap, sounding offended. “She’s a fucking star.”

“Was it for her or for me?” “The money?”

“It was for you, baby girl.” “Why?”

“Because I wanted to take care of you.” The moisture in her eyes glistens from the streetlamps overhead. When she doesn’t respond, I take another step closer, wiping where a single tear trails over her cheek. “It’s your money, Daisy. Do whatever you want with it. Go live your big, poetic, musical life. Make it fucking amazing.”

“One million dollars!”

FUCK YEAH

“I’m sorry if I was too needy and I’m sorry for not telling you about my mother. I’ll do whatever you want to make it up to you.” She whimpers against my chest. “I’ve done everything you told me to, and I’m doing so much better. I go to counseling and I pay my rent on time. I’m taking care of myself and I don’t need you anymore, Ronan. But I want you more than anything in this world.”

“I’m not letting you go. Not for a second.”

“Tell Geo you’re moving out,” I say. She lets out a laugh and pulls away. “Are you asking me to move in with you?” “Well, you just spent all the money you had saved up.” Her laugh is louder this time. “It was worth every penny.”

“Your pregnancy test was positive.”

AHHHHH

“Mad? Are you kidding me? I can’t remember the last time I was this fucking happy.”

“Baby girl, we’re going to do whatever you want to do, and no matter what, I’ll be here. Okay?”

“I love you,” I whisper into the crook of his neck. As he strokes my head, peppering my face with kisses, he whispers against my cheek, “I love you more than anything in this world, baby girl.”

Deep down, I know that Ronan and I were always meant to find each other. The odds may have been stacked against us, but there was something far more powerful bringing us together. In some strange way, I think my mother would be relieved to know we found each other. It may seem unconventional, but this is what she wanted, for both of us to find the kind of love that makes life worth living.

I know he’ll be there to take care of me. And I’ll be there to take care of him.

“You know as soon as that baby is out, I’m going to fuck another one into you,” I say as my gaze roams her naked body.