Never Lie

by Freida McFadden

Take a guess how many of the subjects called this number to report the broken machine. Zero.

Liars fidget. The tone of their voice or speech patterns changes. Liars offer too much information, babbling on with excessive detail to convince themselves or others of what they are saying.

However, even the best lie detector has a twenty-five percent rate of error. I am far more accurate than that.

okay queen

I will know the truth. I always know. Never lie to me.

I have never had a feeling this strong. Something terrible has happened in this house.

“You okay, Tricia?” Ethan asks. “You’re not cold, are you?”

NO I AM NOT COLD

Forget everything I said. I love my husband. Truly.

“And the asking price is so low. This house looks like it should be worth four times as much as that.”

The leather feels stiff, like nobody has used the cushions in ages, and my finger comes away black. Dust—years’ worth of it.

There’s an entire shelf containing books with the exact same title. The Anatomy of Fear.

“Adrienne Hale,” he reads off the back cover. “Isn’t she that shrink who got murdered?”

Fun new facts I’m learning about my husband of six months: he does not have a spiritual side.

How are you? The three most useless words in the universe of communication. Nobody who asks that question wants to know the answer. And nobody who answers ever tells the truth.

Within my house, I have a MicroCell tower and Wi-Fi. But in anticipation of Paige’s visit, I shut them both off. While she is here, I want her full attention. I would never pay more attention to my phone than to a patient, and I don’t enjoy competing for Paige’s attention.

Oka queen

I’m disappointed in Paige for her judgment, even though I’m not surprised. I’m sure many people could judge her for her own choices. If she hadn’t taken the time to push out two rugrats, she might be further in her career. She might not have to suck up to someone like me.

“Of course. The water is a bit brown though, I have to warn you. I’ve gotten used to the metallic taste, but it bothers some people.”

HUH

But today, she has crossed a line. Nobody talks about my patients that way.

GET HERRRR

“Oh, dear,” I say. “It looks like your phone got cracked.”

WITCH

She’s having a bad day. But it’s going to get much worse when she gets the email from me terminating her as my agent.

I just hope he feels the same way about me after he finds out about my revelation. I feel ill every time I think about it. But I can’t keep it from him much longer.

Gurl what u keepingfrom him

If he mentions Judy again, I’m going to punch him in the face. “It’s not Judy’s, okay? Judy would never leave half a glass of water on the kitchen counter like this. And if she did, there’d be lipstick all over the rim.”

“No way.” I shake my head vigorously. “I’m going with you. You’re not leaving me alone down here.”

theyre givin fred and daphne

This, more than anything, is evidence that Dr. Adrienne Hale is dead. Because no woman would voluntarily leave here without taking this gorgeous sweater with her.

Gurl

At any moment during a session, my patients could stand up, grab the letter opener off my desk, and jam it through my eye socket. But my risk is relatively low. Even though I see patients in my home, which people tell me is a mistake, I feel safe.

Well

With one exception. But that will resolve itself soon enough.

I ask all patients for permission prior to recording the sessions, although even when they tell me no, I still record them.

Oop

I will never have to see him again.

well...

“It’s easy to be the best husband ever when I have the best wife ever.”

Gross

I hope he still feels that way after what I have to tell him this weekend. I have a terrible feeling that the conversation will not go well.

Shes pregnant

Finally, I decide on The Shining—one of my favorites—and I tip the book out to swipe it from the shelf. Except it doesn’t come out. I pull harder on the book, but only the top of it comes free. The bottom seems wedged in place. And when I move the top of the book, I hear a loud click. And the bookcase shifts slightly.

SAY FUCKING SIKEES

“And look!” Ethan holds up the bottle of blood-colored wine. “I found something to warm us up in the meantime.” “Oh?”

Oh shes pregnant

He picks up one of the wine glasses, filled almost to the brim with dark red liquid, and I reluctantly do the same. He tilts his glass towards mine. “To our new home,” he says. Oh God.

And I can’t tell Ethan why because he doesn’t know that I’m pregnant. That’s right. I’m knocked up.

Ethan has a temper. He has never unleashed it on me, but I have observed it in action.

RUN

I don’t believe in ghosts, but if I did, her ghost would be pissed right now.

“We should christen our new house,” he murmurs into my neck.

TIME AND PLACE

Well, we do manage to christen the house. It might not be our new house, but we christened somebody’s house.

Yall are so weird

My friends were totally wrong about all the red flags. He’s not perfect, but who is?

babe...

Maybe I’m reluctant to give him some surprising and possibly upsetting news when we’re stuck in an isolated house, just the two of us, where nobody can hear us and there’s no way to leave.

Hmmm

But he would never hurt me. I know that for a fact.

“I guess I don’t care that much. I mean, that shrink woman disappeared like three years ago. It’s not like she used the bathroom yesterday.”

...

I’m sure that’s what’s making me so uncomfortable about this. There’s no reason Ethan shouldn’t take a shower in the master bathroom.

Unless he already bought the house

My mother always used to say, if there was a nut job within fifty miles, they would find me. And that night, he found me.

I notice immediately that he isn’t wearing the dress shirt and slacks that he had on when we left the apartment. He’s wearing a pair of blue jeans bunched up at the ankles and a Yankees T-shirt.

Ethan’s mother and father both died before we were even dating. It was an accident of some sort, but he doesn’t like to talk about it—he clams up at any mention of it.

“Doc, I’m trying, okay? I can’t get a job. It’s not that easy. I don’t have a bunch of fancy degrees like you do.” “You’re a college graduate.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet. My money is good enough for you, but I’m not.”

“You’re a real piece of work, Doc. I can’t believe you. And after I came here with a gift for you.” “You can have the wine back if you want it.”

My first patient is a man with schizophrenia who is convinced that he is Superman, and I want to see if the new dose of Geodon will be enough to keep him from making a flying leap off the roof of a building with the presumption that he will soar through the air.

“There’s something I need to tell you, Ethan.” His eyes darken. “Okay…”