I think caretaking perverts religious messages about giving, loving, and helping. Nowhere in the Bible are we instructed to do something for someone and then scratch their eyes out. Nowhere are we told to walk the extra mile with someone and then grab the person’s cane and beat them with it. Caring about people and giving are good, desirable qualities—something we need to do—but many codependents have misinterpreted the suggestions to “give until it hurts.” We continue giving long after it hurts, usually until we are doubled over in pain. It’s good to give, but we don’t have to give it all
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