Atalanta

by Jennifer Saint

ATALANTA: From the Greek Ἀταλάντη (Atalante) meaning “equal in strength.”

if it’s a girl, expose her on the mountain—

I grew strong on bear milk. I learned to wrestle with my bear siblings, the rough-and-tumble of our play with no quarter given.

It was Artemis who had come for me,

She gave me to the nymphs to raise.

I saw that their lives were dedicated to Artemis; they kept the forest for her, nurturing its springs, its rivers, its plants, and all the life within it. In exchange, they lived there, loved and guarded by her.

I had never known a human hearth; I had no conception of how rare a thing it was to be the protégée of a goddess, to spend my childhood in the wild simplicity and raw magic of the woods.

She was my sister, mother, guide, and teacher all in one, and just like her, I wanted to fear nothing.

“When Aphrodite came, it was in pursuit of her lover, of course, a mortal named Adonis, who loved to hunt. For a while, she amused herself with it, too, chasing after hares and birds and thinking herself brave. She begged him to stay away from the bears, the wolves, and the lions, entreated him never to stalk a wild boar and risk so much as a scratch on his handsome flesh.”

Zeus was pleased to have such skilled twins, so he put his foot down. I’ve never been interested in spending much time with the rest of them anyway, and Hera wouldn’t care to come into the forests.

I made a bargain with him: If he’d let me have the mountains and my girls, then I’d keep out of Hera’s way. But the main thing I wanted was to live untouched by men. I wasn’t going to find myself in my mother’s position if I could help it.”

“Your prowess is a testament to my teaching, everything you’re capable of having grown up here, under my tutelage, in my forest.”

That was Atalanta, I imagined them saying in years to come, slayer of centaurs,

“The gods are talking about it—a voyage unlike any other, a new quest. It’s caught their attention on Mount Olympus. A king of a city called Iolcus has given his nephew a quest: to gather together the greatest band of heroes from across all of Greece to sail with him on his ship, the Argo, from Pagasae harbor in search of a Golden Fleece.”

“You have power and courage, speed and skill far beyond what’s needed in this forest,” she said. “And you’re better already than any warrior out there. You’re greater than any man laying claim to the name of a hero. The world should know the name Atalanta. They should see what you can do.”

“He wants to prove himself worthy, make himself a legend. He has the backing of Hera, who wants a hero to glorify her name, not another that is the son of Zeus or Poseidon, but one who owes his loyalty to her,”

“You go, in my name. You are stronger than them, you are fearless, and there is nothing that any one of them can do that you cannot. I want you to show them all who you are, what you have become.”

“The oracle at Delphi speaks my brother Apollo’s words. He can see into the heart of everything; what is to come is laid out before him, and he chooses what to share. You must listen carefully to his warning and abide by it or suffer the consequences.”

“My followers make the same vow as I did,” she went on. “We all swear to a life of virginity. We are safe and free to live unencumbered, to hunt and be self-sufficient away from the rest of the world. But you didn’t choose to join me, Atalanta; you were left in my forest as a newborn baby.”

The prophecy that comes to you from the oracle is that marriage will be your undoing. If you take a husband, you will lose yourself.”

“Outside my protection, for other girls, there is no choice in it at all. It’s another of your gifts, Atalanta, your freedom. It’s one you must never give up or toss away carelessly.”

“There’s no place for a woman among us.” It was Heracles who spoke, having hauled his great frame up from where he had been reclining. He towered above us. “It’s dangerous.”

“A woman alone among men is always in danger.”

“How can you rely on your men to fight the battles ahead if you can’t trust them? Artemis herself sent me here. I come in her name. I have no interest in anyone here, or anything but the quest. I want to fight beside you. And I’m as good as any one of the men you’ve gathered here.”

“If you join us, no one here can protect you,” Jason continued. “I need no protection. I can defend myself. I killed two centaurs that tried to attack me. I don’t fear any man here.”

“Stay here if you’re afraid to sail with her; lose your chance to come on the greatest quest there’s ever been. Follow me and make your name, or let everyone know you’re too cowardly to join.”

“No one touches her,” he said. “And no one helps her, either. If she can’t keep up, it’s not our problem.”

The frenzy of violence lifted from us as the dawn broke. We held one another close, bathed one another’s wounds, and, as the sun rose, we rinsed the blood from one another’s hair.”

“No man has set foot on Lemnos since my father escaped. Not until the Argonauts arrived.”

“And I trust your judgment better than anyone’s.” “Why is that?” “You see people as they are,” he said. “Perhaps it’s because you don’t conceal anything about yourself. Artifice stands out to you.”

Jason thought the world was built for heroes. I knew we had to build it ourselves.

“What if I had no wife?” I shook my head, confused. “But you do.” “I could leave. With you, both of us together. After the boar hunt.” I pulled my hand free. “What are you talking about?” “I love you.”

“I swore to never marry.” “We’d both be breaking an oath.” I took a deep breath. “I can’t.”

“Can you truly imagine going back to the forest again?” he asked. I didn’t answer. “I’d give up my kingdom,” he said. “I’d leave my family behind. We could go somewhere far away, anywhere we could be together.”

The queen had had her vengeance. Meleager was dead.

“It wasn’t as heroic a quest as you might think. Medea won the Fleece with her magic. We were just there to watch. It was artifice, whatever they’re singing about it now.”

“He is Meleager’s son,” I said. “After I left Calydon, I came back here. I’d thought perhaps I could come back to Artemis, but when I realized I was with child, I knew that I couldn’t. I forfeited her protection and her patronage.”

King Iasus. Your father. He’s put out word that he wants to find you.”

he’s sent out heralds to spread the message that he wants you to come home.”

you’re the daughter of a king, and now he wants to recognize you.”

“He thinks I’ll do instead of a son, if the rumors about me are true. He’s heard he has a warrior for a daughter.”

“I don’t want his backing. I don’t want anything he has to offer me.” The thought of it revolted me. “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad I heard it from you. I’ll be careful not to be seen.”

if going back to Iasus meant that news of me would spread across the land, countering the stories the poets were telling about the Argo, then Artemis might hear of it, too. It could be enough to help me win back her favor.

I am Atalanta, the huntress of Arcadia and heroine of the Argo.”

“Did you love him?” I wondered if he’d have had the boldness to ask me that if we were inside the palace. “I never did. All the time, on the Argo, I was glad that he was married. I was glad that he would go home to his wife at the end of it, that I knew there was an end.” I wondered if that made me sound coldhearted. “I thought he felt the same, but he said he would leave her. I told him no.”

No son has ever been born to me, but it seems the Fates may have sent me a daughter who is equal to any son I could have been blessed with.”

“I’ve sworn I’ll never marry,” I said, my voice carrying loud and clear to all the assembled listeners. “There is no man who can ever match me.”

“Find a man that can outrun me—that’s the only man I’ll marry.”

“We will hold a footrace—the man who can run faster than Atalanta will win her.” He lingered over the next words almost lovingly. “Any man who loses the race will lose his life. Let that be the challenge. This is how we’ll find a husband deserving of my daughter.”

“I don’t trust the king. What if he finds some way to sabotage you?”