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life happens no matter what and ninety percent of that is out of our control. What is in our control is how we choose to respond to it.
fear of speaking up is what has consistently placed women in the dark ages and had us not viewed as equals. Be bold. Be strong. And if this is where it ends for you here, remember you are brilliant and talented. Carve your own path without requiring the aid of anyone else.”
Greyson was the voice. I was bass and occasionally backup vocals. Lenox piano and keyboard. Callan drum. Asher guitar. Suzie our manager.
She is Persephone battling the darkness and monsters of the underworld.
Everyone reacts differently to loss, but true loss affects everyone the same way. That’s why it’s so hard to get over. Because once you lose someone, they take some of you with them. You’re never quite whole again and the rest of you is constantly trying to compensate for that missing piece.
“I am my own hero. Scars are simply souvenirs you collect along the way. They make you tougher and you learn from them. I’ve learned some lessons the hard way and some the soft way. That’s all I could do.
“I care, Aurelia.”
“I don’t want you to care,” she seethes, though her voice cracks at the end before she fixes it with a simple clearing of her throat. “I don’t need to find you any more attractive than I already do. I like not liking you. And I swore, just last night, and frankly every damn night before it, that from now on, you’d only be Mr. Monroe and never Zax to me. I can’t lose this opportunity, and frankly, you’re simply not worth the risk to me.”
“You don’t want me to care?”
“No. I don’t.”
“Fine. That doesn’t mean I don’t want to fuck you, Aurelia, because I do. And it also doesn’t mean I don’t want to swoop in and be your hero, because I do. But I’m not going to act on it. That’s a promise you can hold on to. So if you believe we can play it safe with each other, that’s what we’re gonna do. We’ll pretend all this other stuff away. But like it or not, every time you see me...
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“I won’t look,” I tell him. “But I want to hear you. Please, Zax. I want to hear you come while you’re thinking about me.”
And for the first time in eight years, I realize that’s exactly what I want to be with her.
“You’re not an except. You’re not a but. You’re not a however. You’re an addiction I don’t know how to claim or conquer.” My eyes close at his words, my heart lurching in my chest. “I have never wanted anyone the way I want you, Aurelia, and that’s what’s hurting my soul.”
“You’ve bewitched me. I’m no longer myself.” He takes my hand and places it over his pounding heart, his eyes wild and fierce. “You’re all I’ve been thinking about. Tell me how to make it stop.”
“I’m going to leave and you’re going to do the same in five minutes,” he tells me when I don’t answer. “Meet me downstairs in my car and we’ll talk.” “I—” “Either that, or I’m taking you to the bathroom, lifting up your dress, and fucking you here for all to hear how loud I make you scream my name. The choice is
yours. I’m done pretending, Aurelia. I was on my last legs with this and then you walked in that door. Five minutes or I’ll come back up here and find you.”
Her. This woman. My reckoning and my salvation.
Because I just fell in love with Zaxton Monroe. And I’m not sure if this will turn out to be the best or worst moment of my life.
“I’ll never be done with you. I’ll get never get enough. For you, I’ll keep treading water. Till my muscles burn and my lungs scream and even then I’ll keep going. You deserve the world, Aurelia, and there is nothing more
I want than to be the one to give it to you.”
“Thank you, Aurelia. Thank you for reminding me what it is to live. To love. To have passion. To believe in happiness. To look forward to tomorrow. To want forever. All with you.”
