But it’s problematic when girls go into that exploratory phase feeling secretive and ill informed. If the message you send is “We don’t talk about such things,” then—guess what!—your kids move toward adulthood with the idea that being an adult means keeping secrets. The nuns didn’t teach us anything about reproductive health in biology class. We certainly didn’t cover Lolita in English class. Mom didn’t talk about things that fell into nebulous categories like “private” and “dirty.” I learned the basics from feminine-hygiene ads in Seventeen. My understanding of sexuality was a fog machine of
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