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“Mommy, who’s that?” Camila calls from the top of the stairs. Her wide blue eyes check Cal out before her gaze swings back to mine.
“Here, mister. For your boo-boo.” Oh, shit. Alana has a daughter. A five-year-old daughter with dirty blond hair and big blue eyes eerily like mine.
My voice drops, barely stronger than a whisper. “Moving on from me.” The regret hits me instantly, making me wish I never opened my mouth and asked my question in the first place. He avoids looking at me as he focuses on something over my shoulder. “I can’t answer that.”
“You always deserved better than me.” I rip my arm free of his hold. “No. I deserved better from you.”
Sometimes it is those with the loudest voices who struggle the hardest.
“Life is about perspective. Until you change yours, you’ll always be tied to this.” I hand him the vodka bottle.
“Who lied to you and called you pretty?” She bats her lashes. “You did…while I was between your legs with my tongue deep inside your needy cunt.”
Take that, you little witch. She chokes on her breath. “God.” “Please, no need to call me God outside of the bedroom. It gives me a complex.”
“There are plenty of ways I’d enjoy torturing you—all of which you would be excited for.”
“You smiled when I screamed, you psychopath.” “It brought back good memories.”
“I had lost my reason for getting sober in the first place.” Her brows furrow. “What? Money? Hockey? The will to live a normal life?” “You, Lana. I lost you.”
always thought we were meant to be. I might have screwed up the timing a bit, but that doesn’t change the fact that there is no one I want more in this world than you.”
Lana is the only woman I ever loved, and it’s time I started acting like it.
“You and Cami aren’t a deal. You two are a lottery jackpot, and it’s time someone treated you both that way.”
He presses a chaste kiss against my skin. “I don’t deserve you.” “Then become the man who does.”
I wish to kick my addiction for good.
I want to shed the addiction that feels like an anchor wrapped around my neck, keeping me from rising above the demons holding me down, almost as much as I want to become a man worthy of Lana and Cami.
I dare you to wait for me.
The real me. The sober me. The best me who wants to spend the rest of his days getting drunk on life with you.
I lift my chin. “I’m doing it for myself this time.” “That’s why it will work. You’re going to get better, and I’ll be rooting for you every step of the way.”
“Purchasing the house isn’t about buying your love or trust or anything like that. I know that will only come with hard work and proving to you that I’m committed to being the best version of myself for both of us. The only reason I want to buy the house is because I want to buy into the future you want, whether it’s with me or someone else.”
“Staying sober is going to be a process. Thirty days in rehab is a good start, but it’s not an instant cure for a lifelong addiction. I’ll have to put in the work and commit to bettering myself every single day. I only hope you’re willing to share the journey with me, because God, I want you to.
