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“I used to hate everybody,” I say. “Until I met you.”
My mother slaps her hand to her heart and releases a quick “Oh dear good lord, Jesus Christ, holy shit, thank god!” She blows out a calming breath after her slew of blasphemy.
I know it won’t be tonight, but I’m still curious how long it’ll be before she finally lets me pop her cork. Nope. Still not sexy enough. Smash her burger? Oh God, no. Plant my flower in her garden? What the hell, Daniel? Make love to her? Yeah. That’s it. That’s the one.

