Poems for the Signs

by Michaela Angemeer

i'm finally starting to learn that who can do the hurt first without getting hurt in return isn't a competition i want to win

are you in love or are you just scared of being alone

it took me twenty-seven years to learn how to lie i thought honesty was a natural inclination for everyone i know that’s sweet i love the person i used to be but unfortunately i also loved a lot of liars who knew the lies that would work on me

what if you stopped looking at the people who don’t love you what if you turned towards all the ones who do

i thought i would always love you but while i was standing in the sun you kept looking for shade the more i nourished the more you withered i tried to make us last longer emptied my cup to fill up yours until i learned that there’s no point in watering something that doesn’t want to grow

i just want to feel safe enough to fall in love

i yearn for all my former best friends

sometimes we put wishes onto people that they aren’t ready to make come true

sometimes the best thing you can do for the people you love is take care of yourself

if you’re hard to find your person might be too

i grew up with conditional love and frozen food no wonder nourishment feels abnormal

maybe they knew they were holding you back

i’m sorry that your first heartbreak was from someone who was supposed to love you the most.

i’m tired of constantly cracking myself open transforming can’t i stay the same for a little while can’t i just be this version of me a little while longer

will you still love me in the winter when my skin is dry my lips are chapped and my smile is less bright when i sleep in a little longer and go out a little less when some days i can’t make you laugh when some days all i do is cry will you still love me when some days i don’t want to wake up at all

i just wanna flash before your eyes before you die

if you keep falling in love with half-baked people you will keep feeling the pain of being loved with half a heart

how do you start a relationship without seeing it end in your head first

i started holding other people to the standards i hold myself to turns out no one could meet them either

i will be the last woman in my family to be used as a pin cushion a mirror a reflection of a man’s wounds