Without a Hitch

by Avery Maxwell

Like slime the banana?” My father wiggles his eyebrows with a suggestive expression. I choke on my old-fashioned. “Jesus, Dad.” “Check the oil,” my mother adds. “Feed the kitty? Knocking boots? Bumping uglies?” I glare at Nova. “The last thing I need to think about is all the euphemisms my family can come up with for having sex.” “The no-pants dance? Two-person push-ups? Stuff the taco?” My sister is thoroughly enjoying herself now. “Test the humidity?” my father barks out. “Burping the worm in the mole hole?”

“Ride the skin bus to tuna town.”

Welcome to our chaos, man! You’re part of the family now.”