On the day either relationship is legalized, you begin to possess the full rights and privileges of a spouse, or a child. But it will take time, even years, for you to fully inhabit your new identity. Think about what brings about this change, however. Does a new wife keep a copy of her marriage license on her bedside and take it up and read it over every morning and evening? It’s true, it’s true, I’m legally married. Wow. No, what turns a legal truth into a living one is living in that new relationship. It’s a product of living out of your new identity. How do we know we are doing that? How
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