He Who Fights With Monsters 7 (He Who Fights with Monsters, #7)

by Shirtaloon

“Helping the living with the affairs of the dead is why we are here,” Aldrich said. “It's just that when the living and the dead are the same person, there's more paperwork.”

“Everybody’s sorry. Never seems to stop them, though, does it?”

“I get it,” he said. “You've been saddled with managing a situation and I'm floating in the middle like a turd you're not allowed to fish out of the punch bowl.”

Never lie when the truth can lie for you, and don't do things for one reason if you can do them for two.

“A greeting card is like that, except instead of being full of nice things, it’s a piece of card stock. It’s like a social puzzle where you have to figure out how long you need to leave it sitting around before you can throw it away without being rude.”

“There is no better with puns, Mr Asano. There is only worse.”

“You’ll never owe me for that. Friends don’t count favours.”