The Golden Spoon

by Jessa Maxwell

The feeling is coming back. I’ve had it for years, an endless, aching boredom. Generally, when I start to feel the emptiness, my first line of defense is to catch it off guard with a distraction. I’ve done this more times than I can count with a variety of different activities—tennis, yachting, sky diving, elaborate trips to climb far-flung mountains. I have to say that all of them have worked to varying degrees. There is an art to finding a good distraction, one that will keep you from sinking into the abyss. There needs to be some action incorporated into it, and it needs to involve other people, so nothing too sedentary or isolating. No knitting or chess. But it can’t be just empty action. There needs to be some sort of goal, some way of bettering yourself or learning a new skill. Otherwise, you will start to question what the point of it even is, and you will become restless. And if you are at loose ends, you will leave yourself open, vulnerable, and the feeling will find you.