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January 12 - January 12, 2025
When we dare to be so very known, we risk being so very hurt.
And we can’t pride ourselves on being loyal and longsuffering in our relationships when it’s really perpetuating violations of what God says love is.
Love is not dishonorable. Love does not justify wrongs to enable selfishness. Love does not celebrate evil. Love requires truth. Love leads to honor, kindness, and compassion.
Love breathes the oxygen of trust.
People who are irresponsible with our hearts should not be granted great access to our hearts. And the same is true for all other kinds of access as well—physical, emotional, spiritual, and financial.
God established boundaries to protect intimacy, not decimate it.
“Love can be unconditional but relational access never should be.”
People who are genuine and honest don’t go on and on trying to convince you what a good person they are.
When God gave the boundary, He spoke in the context of freedom. He wasn’t trying to be cruel to Adam and Eve. He was trying to protect their freedom. God said to Adam, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden” (Genesis 2:16) before He communicated the boundary around the one tree they must avoid.
Changing an outside behavior without changing the internal issue that’s driving the behavior is like painting a house that has a crumbling foundation.
“Adults inform. Children explain.”—Jim Cress
When we allow our emotions to be misused and abused, there will be consequences.
The feeling of anxiety is like an alarm bell alerting us to remember the Lord is near,
“Your healing will bring out the emotional immaturity of those around you not willing to pursue health for themselves.”
If you feel you have to trade the best of who you are to protect the worst of who they are, do not ignore this red flag.
This means to be sober-minded has to do with maintaining control over ourselves. Just like when someone drinks too much alcohol, they have to “sober up” to regain control, to be sober-minded means regaining control over our actions and reactions. Remember, we have an enemy who doesn’t just want to tempt us—he wants to devour us. He wants us to act and react out of control. And he wants our thoughts to spin out of control.
A manipulative person will see your boundary as a yellow light while you intended it to be a red light—with a full stop—to ensure your safety. A manipulator will intentionally speed through that intersection, risking whatever damage may happen to themselves or to you. A manipulative person will do anything to resist feeling controlled.
Unhealthy people typically don’t manage their emotions and expectations (self-regulate) very well and can easily get offended when their lack of responsibility doesn’t become your emergency.
Healthy people understand your limits because they are in touch with their own limitations.
Good boundaries bring relief to the grief of letting other people’s opinions, issues, desires, and agendas run our life.
I must stay whole by keeping what I know, what I feel, and what I do in alignment with God’s truth about who I am.
Maybe the real core issue is that I fear there will be a devastating gap between what I think I need and what God will actually provide.
But if I have a need and I demand it from someone, that’s a sign that I’ve crossed over into wanting from them what I should be seeking from God.
“Mental health is a commitment to reality at all costs.”
God didn’t abandon Adam and Eve, but their relationship dramatically changed. God no longer provided a perfect environment where gardening was immediately fruitful.
The greatest joy in life isn’t when it all works out like we hoped it would. It’s when we experience the God of the universe pausing to reach us and remind us we aren’t alone.
