And Every Morning the Way Home Gets Longer and Longer

by Fredrik Backman

Her hair is old but the wind in it is new, and he still remembers what it felt like to fall in love; that’s the last memory to abandon him. Falling in love with her meant having no room in his own body.

“We had too little time,” he says. She shakes her head. “We had an eternity. Children and grandchildren.” “I only had you for the blink of an eye,” he says. She laughs. “You had me an entire lifetime. All of mine.” “That wasn’t enough.”

Do you remember what I told you about failing?” “The only time you’ve failed is if you don’t try once more.”

“Our teacher made us write a story about what we want to be when we’re big,” Noah tells him. “What did you write?” “I wrote that I wanted to concentrate on being little first.”

I would rather be old than a grown-up. All grown-ups are angry, it’s just children and old people who laugh.”

Almost all grown adults walk around full of regret over a good-bye they wish they’d been able to go back and say better.

“You never became ordinary to me, my love. You were electric shocks and fire.”

She kisses him. “I know that the way home is getting longer and longer every morning. But I loved you because your brain, your world, was always bigger than everyone else’s. There’s still a lot of it left.” “I miss you unbearably.”

“Darling stubborn you. I know you never believed in life after death. But you should know that I’m dearly, dearly, dearly hoping that you’re wrong.”

That’s one good thing about forgetting things. You forget the things that hurt too.”

“What does it feel like?” “Like constantly searching for something in your pockets. First you lose the small things, then it’s the big ones. It starts with keys and ends with people.”

“No, death is a slow drum. It counts every beat. We can’t haggle with it for more time.”

“We lived an extraordinarily ordinary life.” “An ordinarily extraordinary life.”

She was a force of nature. Everything I am came from her, she was my Big Bang.”

“She got lost in my heart, I think. Couldn’t find her way out. Your grandma always had a terrible sense of direction. She could get lost on an escalator.”

“Tell me that we danced, Noahnoah. Tell me that that’s what it’s like to fall in love, like you don’t have room for yourself in your own feet.”

once your good-bye is perfect, you have to leave me and not look back. Live your life. It’s an awful thing to miss someone who’s still here.”

“And I don’t think you need to be scared of forgetting me,” the boy says after a moment’s consideration. “No?” The corners of the boy’s mouth reach his earlobes. “No. Because if you forget me then you’ll just get the chance to get to know me again. And you’ll like that, because I’m actually a pretty cool person to get to know.”

“But the universe gave you both Noah. He’s the bridge between you. That’s why we get the chance to spoil our grandchildren, because by doing that we’re apologizing to our children.”

The amount I love you, Noah, the sky will never be that big.”

“That’s good, that’s good, Noahnoah, a great brain can never be kept on Earth,”

It’s a big universe to be angry at but a long life to have company in.