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Kindle Notes & Highlights
being objectified is an intoxicating little feeling I’ve missed terribly.
In situations like this, the truth is what we offer when we don’t have anything better.
“We’re in a bad spot, but aren’t those what define love? The downs, how you manage and endure them because who the hell has trouble with the ups? This, right now”—I splay my fingers on the table—“is the shit nobody talks about because it’s hard.” “Nathan—”
Anonymity breeds apathy. When you’re anonymous, no one cares to save you.
Not for the first time in my life, the bruises on my throat gather into the unmistakable shape of human fingers.
If we’re unsustainable, we’re less like a cigarette and more like the sun. A seemingly endless supply of energy to draw from. An expiration date that’s more of a technicality than a reality.
lounge. I’ve never been, but it’s a Washington landmark. A five-star
Sitting pretty in the waiting room with the other addicts. We weren’t the worst of them. I mean, I hadn’t escalated to the needle, and I clung to that fact like a fucked-up honor badge. Funny what you take pride in at the barrel’s bottom.
he reached into his pocket and produced a stack of napkins. Cafeteria napkins from the hospital—the pattern was plainly familiar. Did he swipe a handful of napkins on the way out? “Sorry.” He wiped a tiny drop of himself off the leather armrest. “I’m kind of a clean freak.” I laughed, but something about that bothered me. A tiny, niggling little thought soon lost in the wake of all that was Dr. Nathan Klein: If he’d never done anything like this before, couldn’t possibly have expected it to happen—like he’d said moments ago—why bring napkins? Why come prepared?
The inside of the bottle is painted in an appetizing powder. Terrifyingly so and saliva pools under my tongue. If the lid comes off, if I uncap it, I’m done. Game over. I’ll take a handful at best, then finish them off over the course of the evening. Each dose cultivating courage for the next until there’s only cosmic oblivion.
Yes, I’m escalating. But I don’t have to anymore.
The truth is supposed to set you free, but sometimes it’s not the truth that saves you. Prescribed by Dr. Nathan Klein. It’s the lies.
