Exasperating (Elite Protection Services #3)

by Onley James

“Bail?” The officer scoffed. “Yeah, the money you pay to be released from jail after you’ve made an ass out of yourself.”

“Happy about what? Happy that I’m heterosexual? Well, plot twist. I’m not. I was just…experimenting. I’m still super gay, Father. Lots of gay sex. All the time. Can’t get enough dick.”

“Go ahead. She won’t stop nagging until you do. She’s powered by gay tears.”

“You fucked his wife…and his son.” Yep. There it was. What could he say? “Not at the same time?”

I submit that I’m being unfairly targeted and punished not because I fuck our clients but because I just refuse to marry all of them afterward, and honestly, it’s starting to feel a bit like discrimination.”

“Assaulting a police officer? Angel face in there? The kid is the personification of a basket of kittens. What did he assault him with? Kindness?” Linc’s lips twitched as he tried to keep a straight face. “A twelve-inch black dildo known as the ‘hole wrecker.’”

That dude’s dick has given more rides than Uber.” Calder clicked his tongue. “Oh, don’t be like that. I heard you love Uber.”

“All our sweet baby gay got was a handjob and heartache.”

What makes you two think I’m a virgin?” Charlie gave him a pitying gaze. “Oh, sweetie. If we were villagers, you’d be the first one we’d chuck into a volcano to appease the gods.” “Wow. Am I that obvious?”

“First, he beats a cop with a sex toy, and now, he’s murdered a man with a cheese knife. This boy is either a secret assassin or a walking disaster.”

“I know what it’s like to be invisible, for nobody to want you. I couldn’t stomach the thought of him living the rest of his life feeling unloved.”