This Spells Love

by Kate Robb

The one that wronged you, under waning gibbous But be forewarned—” Aunt Livi pauses, then licks her thumb and rubs the page in front of her with a soft grunt. “Uh…you gonna tell us what comes next?” Kiersten tries to peek over her shoulder at the book, but Livi’s oversized cardigan blocks the way. “Or are we just gonna ignore that whole cryptic-warning part?” Aunt Livi squints at the book, moving so close that her nose almost touches the paper. “There appears to be some sort of stain on the directions.” She sniffs. “I suspect salsa. But don’t fret.” She sets it on the counter with a bang. “I think I’ve got it.”

Whatever close enough 🤷🏽‍♀️ we’re already using jerk chicken instead of chicken feet

“I murdered him,” I sob. “I did. He was just crawling along minding his own business, and I snuffed the life right out of him.” “It was just a spider, Gems.” He doesn’t understand. That spider did nothing wrong. He was just hanging out, trying to put one hairy leg in front of the other, and he got his life demolished. “Yeah, but he probably had a wife.” A terrible thought occurs to me. “Oh my god, what if he had, like, little baby spiders?”

He may not know me, but I know him, and I know there’s only one place Daxon McGuire hangs out on a Tuesday night. — The Grand Victoria Lawn Bowling and Curling Club is not known as a hot spot for nightlife in the city.

Ah yes let’s ADD to the stalker charges

“Where do you keep the paper towels?” I ask him. He points to a display a whole five feet away. “See that pyramid of paper towels?” “Yes.” “That’s where we keep the paper towels.”

I spent four years dating Stuart, who was as predictable as the number two setting on my BLACK+DECKER toaster.

Jfc just microwave the bread at that point

He glances at my extra coffee. Before I can explain why I have two cups, it hits me. This coffee wasn’t meant for me. Aunt Livi, sometimes I wonder about you. “Need some caffeine?” I hand him the untouched cup. “I have a strong suspicion this is dark roast.”

Aunt Livi is dropping hints left and right and is probably getting REAL pissed no one has asked if she’s a witch yet

Although her bookstore is closed for the day, there’s a group of about ten women gathered in a circle, matching paperbacks in their laps, each holding a lit candle. Weird for normal people. Not so weird for Aunt Livi.

Definitely her covens weekly book club

The chicken is sitting in a red Tupperware container next to the cashbox,

Are we ever gonna figure out what the fucking chicken does E: no.