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In the midst of pouring tears, he cried: “I won’t forget! “I will never forget you!”
“USELESS TRASH!” Qi Rong laughed out loud. “What useless trash! I knew you wouldn’t dare kill me! No matter how I humiliate you, no matter how I drag you through the mud, so long as I have a knife to someone else’s throat, you can’t do a thing to me. You useless coward—what’s a god like you still alive for?”
Qi Rong’s smile froze as Xie Lian threatened quietly. “Just to give you a heads-up, if one of these days I fall into a bad mood, I might hand you over to Hua Cheng and have him think up a way to deal with you. So watch yourself, you hear me?”
He then slowly replied, “Guzi, that’s not your dad, it’s someone else. Your dad has been possessed. He’s currently a bad guy.” Guzi was only confused by this explanation; he couldn’t comprehend what he was being told. “Someone else? No, I recognize him. He’s my dad.”
Hes so funny for this
“Duh!” Qi Rong said. “I’m telling you, man or ghost, whoever gave that to you must not mean well.” “Oh.” Xie Lian squatted down again. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ‘OH’?!” Qi Rong cried. Xie Lian didn’t bother turning to face him as he calmly responded, “‘Oh’ just means that it’d take a miracle for anyone to actually believe the things you say. I choose to believe in the person who gave this to me, and I’ve decided to keep wearing it.”
you tell em baby
“You know Pei Ming,” Shi Qingxuan said. “He’s got plenty of descendants, his grand-however-many-sons are everywhere.
Ok but who was he having babbids w as a mlrtal
Pei Ming spoke up in his own defense, “Hey, you can’t say that. In folklore it’s true that I’ve seduced pretty much everyone, but in this particular case I really haven’t. Don’t wrong the innocent.”
There were plenty of plays about Crimson Rain Sought Flower in the Mortal Realm, but they were usually titled something like The Red Demon Torched the Temples of Thirty-Three Gods and the Heavens Could Do Fuck-all About It, or Crimson Rain Sought Flower Strung Up the Martial and Civil Gods and Slapped Them Around With But One Hand, and so on—
“Ge! I’m eighth this year!” She was acting like a child begging her parents for a reward after having been praised by her teacher, and Xie Lian couldn’t help but smile. However, Shi Wudu sharply scolded her, “Only eighth? What’s there to be happy about?!”
:(
Just then, Pei Ming chuckled. “I did say that Crimson Rain Sought Flower didn’t kidnap His Highness out of ill intent, but no one believed me. Will you finally believe me now?”
Hualian shipper since day 1
Hearing this, Qi Rong immediately cried, “DEAR GOD! PLEASE MAKE THIS PERSON TRIP TO HIS DEATH, RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW!” Xie Lian found that hilarious. “What’s a ghost like you doing begging the heavens for anything?”
“That beauty exists in this world is, in itself, something to be grateful for.”
where did my son go?” “He was probably devoured,” Xie Lian answered. The wealthy merchant shuddered. “D-devoured?!” Xie Lian nodded.
Hes so funny be didnt even sugar coat tghbat jeez
Xie Lian was excellent at tolerating pain. Never mind stepping on a needle, if his leg were caught in a giant snare, he wouldn’t utter a sound, if the situation called for him to bear it in silence.
Then he found himself caught by a pair of strong arms. One hand circled his waist, and the other grasped his chin. In the next second, something cold and soft covered his lips.
Giggling and kicking my feet rn
The moment he realized it was Hua Cheng, he stopped struggling.
hehehehhe
His face had always been handsome, and out of the water it was even more eye-catching. His locks were exceedingly black, his skin extremely pale, and on the right side of his cheek, a very thin braid with a red string was intricately woven through his hair. For the first time, Xie Lian realized that Hua Cheng’s hairline was a subtle widow’s peak; it made his face look even more shapely and fine. The black eyepatch covering his eye added a murderous aura that muted this elegance, but it balanced his good looks almost perfectly. Hua
“I…I…I…” The I’s were uttered innumerable times until he randomly blurted, “I’m a little hungry.” Hua Cheng was taken aback. Xie Lian hadn’t yet recovered from the shock; his mind was a jumbled mess. “No. I…I…I’m a little sleepy…”
“Who goes there?! Who dares?! Don’t ya know what this place is? Are ya done with life or did ya wanna die again? I… Holy crap, ain’t this Chengzhu?!” The crowd of ghosts immediately hollered in unison, “GOOD DAY, YER OL’ LORDSHIP!”
“Chengzhu! Are you trying to rape someone?! Do you need help?! We’ll help you hold them down!” “Beat it!” Hua Cheng furiously ordered.
THEIR UNCONDITIONAL SUPPORT IS INSANE ?!?@
Maybe what Hua Cheng told him beforehand had made him try extra hard to endure the pain, and his efforts backfired. Sensing Xie Lian shrink back, Hua Cheng held his ankle tighter and reassured him with a soft voice, “Don’t worry. It’ll be over soon. Don’t be scared.”
“I’m a little hungry.” “…” It was only after the words had left his lips that Xie Lian realized he’d said anything at all. Embarrassed by the reaction on Hua Cheng’s face, Xie Lian explained himself honestly. “This time it’s true…” A moment later, Hua Cheng finally snorted and laughed out loud. Once he laughed, it was as if all of Xie Lian’s clouded gloom dispersed, and he sighed in relief.
“Yeah! Of course we gotta get excited when great-uncle comes around!” Xie Lian didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. What the heck were they even saying? “Stop that nonsense!” Hua Cheng barked. “Shut up!” The crowd of ghosts hurriedly acquiesced. “Yes, sir! Chengzhu is absolutely correct. We’re shutting up. He’s not our great-uncle!”
“I didn’t know…gege suffers from such an unspeakable affliction?” he asked, deadpan. Xie Lian immediately cried, “I don’t!” Then he lamented woefully, “San Lang…” Hua Cheng nodded. “Very well. San Lang understands. I won’t speak another word on the subject.” He put on the face of an extremely good and obedient individual, but he was very obviously faking it.
“You’re so insincere,” Xie Lian said. Hua Cheng laughed. “I promise, you will not find another person more sincere than me in this world.” At that familiar response, Xie Lian laughed too.
“Many times I’ve passed through the flowers, yet I spare them no glance; For half my fate is in cultivation, and the other half, in you.”
ugh theyre so gay
His eyes wandered to the edge of the altar, and he stopped. At the corner of the jade altar table sat a tiny, lonesome flower.
Hehehhe
as he hastily followed, feeling rueful as he thought, How come Paradise Manor gets set on fire every time I visit?
“You’re a man and a heavenly official. This is the Palace of Divine Might! How could you do something so unmannerly? No, don’t turn into a woman either! Even in a woman’s form it’s equally disgraceful; change back right this instant!”
:/
Xie Lian felt his soul shaking, and he forced himself to swallow the habitual “I can’t get erect” alibi, which almost escaped through his teeth.
Xie Lian’s expression and tone grew solemn. “Miss, I may not be a saint, but I still know a faithful heart. If I did not love someone, I would never cross any such lines with them,” he said sternly. “If I did, I would never allow that person to suffer any speck of grief, even if I had to beg and collect scraps, or busk and perform on the streets to support my family. You are in the Palace of Divine Might; do not speak falsehoods.”
“Wow, so I was right!” Shi Qingxuan piped up again. “Just looking at His Highness, I could tell he must’ve cultivated that kind of path. If that’s the case, never mind knocking anyone up, I bet he’s never even held anyone’s hand.”
“Sorry about that, Your Highness. I only wanted to convince everyone that you’re really the ascetic sort, but I hadn’t realized you weren’t. So you’ve indulged in such experiences; I really couldn’t tell!” That last statement shattered Xie Lian’s will. He choked out with difficulty, “Don’t say any more. That was…an accident…”
have a sword here, Yanzhen.10 It possesses a particular ability: should the blood of a virgin flow upon it, it shall not be stained but become brighter as it is washed. Take a drop of your blood and let it fall upon the blade, and we shall see the truth.” Although it had been common knowledge for years that Jun Wu had a hobby of collecting rare and strange swords, the heavenly officials still thought to themselves, Why does My Lord have all these messed-up swords? What’s even the use in collecting them…?
Furthermore, he and Xie Lian practiced the same cultivation method, and Mu Qing would never even consider ruining his cultivation by touching a woman.
heheh virgin
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I didn’t see it was you. I won’t do it again.” After stroking it a few times, Eming’s eye squinted, and the trembling finally stopped.
stroking it?? yooo
Guzi seemed to be scared of Hua Cheng, and he rushed to hide behind Xie Lian. Xie Lian chided him, “Don’t worry, this gege is a good person.” “Nah, I’m a very bad person.” Hua Cheng replied. Although that was what he said, he flicked his hand and a tiny silver butterfly flipped out of his sleeve; fluttering its little wings, it flew errantly toward Guzi. Guzi’s inky little eyes bulged as he stared in fixated wonder at the tiny silver butterfly, and he reached out to try to catch it in spite of himself.
Hua Cheng nonchalantly glanced at Lang Ying, but this gaze was quite different from the one he turned on Guzi. When Hua Cheng looked at Lang Ying, his eyes were cold and sharp, utterly unfriendly.
the white silk bandage whipped the logs, and chunks of wood originally thick as thighs were instantly chopped into thin sticks of kindling. Having shown off its skills, Ruoye arched into an odd, exaggerated form in front of Eming and Fangxin, like it was demonstrating its strength and beauty.
Hua Cheng had been observing Xie Lian the entire time; he looked like he wanted to advise him in some way at first, but in the end he smiled and said nothing of the sort.
Whoever the hell can stomach that shit will break free from the bondage of the Three Realms, flee the wheel of dharma, no one…” Qi Rong trailed off when he saw Hua Cheng ladle himself a full bowl, then sit next to the altar table inside the shrine and take a bite, his face unchanging and steady as the mountains. Qi Rong was shaken to the core. A thought he’d never had before flashed through his mind: As expected of a supreme!
Turning around, Xie Lian saw that the bowl in Hua Cheng’s hand was almost empty. He was eating leisurely, looking at Xie Lian as he did. Xie Lian’s eyes lit up, and he rose to his feet. “San Lang, are you finished?”
The village girls were shy and nervous, so who they’d really come to see was quite obvious. Xie Lian couldn’t help but sigh in awe as he thought, Beauty really can fill a stomach.
However, it was too late. Puqi Shrine was only so big, and it had no places to hide. Shi Qingxuan and Ming Yi immediately saw that behind Xie Lian there stood a Supreme Ghost King, who was in the middle of doing dishes.
He grabbed some spoons and filled two bowls. Xie Lian wanted to stop him, to be honest. But Hua Cheng had been so consistently encouraging, burying seeds of confidence within him.
have to ask… Who’s laughing? Who’s singing? Who’s blowing cold air up my back? Who made the shrine this dark?” Shi Qingxuan wiped away his tears. “Oh, that’s all me. It’s just a little spell, don’t mind it. Just setting the mood.”
He was standing there, admiring his new abode, when suddenly a tiny voice came from one of the corners, “This dwelling of yours will collapse in two months!” “So what did you do?” Shi Qingxuan asked. “Nothing,” Xie Lian replied. “I said, ‘Two months? If it’s still standing in seven days, then it’ll be a real miracle.’” “…” Hua Cheng’s lips curved slightly, but that smile quickly faded.
But who could’ve known that it would wait for over half a year? In that half a year, Xie Lian experienced not a single joyous occasion!
He suspected perhaps that his Venerable of Empty Words fled back to its own kind and griped to them about Xie Lian’s general vileness. Shi Qingxuan listened up to that point and couldn’t manage to hold it in; he snorted a laugh. “Is it very funny?” Hua Cheng asked quietly. Shi Qingxuan knew it was inappropriate and instantly schooled his expression. “Sorry, Your Highness,” he apologized solemnly.
As he considered his options, Hua Cheng smiled and propped his chin on one hand. “Is gege going to try to catch a glimpse of that Reverend of Empty Words? If it wouldn’t be a bother, will you bring me along? It’s a rare monster, after all. I’ve never seen it myself.” Much ashamed, but San Lang understands my predicament, Xie Lian thought to himself.
