We also feel obligated rather than energized by our generosity when we are asked to be generous to people we’re not close to. In one study, people recalled a time they spent $20 on either a strong tie (e.g., a good friend, family member, or romantic partner) or a weak tie (e.g., an acquaintance, co-worker, or classmate). They felt better after recalling an instance of generosity with a strong tie. Another study found that people’s mood improved after helping someone they desired a relationship with but not when helping someone they didn’t.
